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..retromuta- | by tOkKa
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..retromuta-

-->>..

 

" ..My brain is falling out. " - David

 

I slip as i wake from sleep.. to regain an awakeness from the midstate of conciounsness and where nightmare originate.

 

Excruciating amounts of Mucous slowly suffocates me. I wipe the goo from my eyes.

 

Red is spurting from my wrist.

 

Discharge,scum,muculent,gunk,mire,muck and milk.

 

O'.. tOkKa, your dripping..

 

..perhaps my she should have thrown her baby out with the bath water..

 

it seems so much as if she had thrown her baby off a cliff she'd have been much happier.

 

My ears hurt..they bleed..the blood drips from the canals..streaming away with the rest of me.

 

Ruination.. Toxic i drip.. ..i melt..i'm dripping..leaking.

 

..EVERY WAKING MOMENT.. EVERY BREAKING MOMENT.. YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH IDEALS YOU CAN NOT EVER HAVE..

 

..what is not solid can not truly break. i DRIP..

 

..every dripping moment to become a liquid cipher..

 

..this shell..this skin is viscous.

 

I leak of hypocracy..

 

.. Zero ..

 

No SOLIDARTY.. even the snowmen melt away.

 

I shun her..yet i am so thankful to her.

 

..this fragile planet can break .. i cannot.. ..

 

..to try break that which is ooze is only to have it consume your effort..

  

..be like water.. you become water..

 

..tho' i am premordial but less organic..

 

i become ooze..

 

purge.. ..weak.

 

Dead-like. Dripping..

 

I hate her so.. i love her so..

 

she'd soon see me not exist..i'd soon climb a mountain for her.

 

The mixture of so much hate and so much love seems undefinable..

 

..grey,grey sweat from blankets of anxiety.

 

..Snowmass.. snowbaby.

 

noone listens.. .. no one can help

 

..noone will ..words melt..soon they stop trying to understand..

 

..it would prolly sound sludge drops and splats on the grinders anyway.

 

Even if i was to be held.. i'd be as if grasping a water-balloon.

 

Rain.. hot;hard pavement..

 

snow,slush,mud..

 

pond,river,ocean ..

 

..acid..

 

..urine..

 

.. the contagioned defilement of a gorilla ..

 

Some kids pushed over a portable lavatory in the park.

 

Soggy ..slop..drip .. drip.. tOkKa drips..

 

..plop and puddle .. i surround myself with plastic creatures and reminders of things & personages i care about.

 

Stories..each creature has a story..so many of them could tell a million.

 

Parts of me canot listen anymore.

 

God i hate her so..

 

..i fucking hate me so..

 

She is killing me..

 

..i shall destroy me..

 

She is cancer.. ..i love her so..

   

I shun her ..yet i am so thankful to her..

 

..lucid.. the blur and the dreamlike slowly blob and ooze .. taking me away ..

   

I become less real.. more slime. Creatures are more real.

 

One used to pray for death before he became less solid.

 

Now i drip.. .. my flesh is dripping away,fizzles ..boils.. melts.

 

To become less than you ever were..

 

I am not substance to feed even he creatures.

 

Yet i am greatful for the distraction.

 

..i remain a stain to be washed away..

 

ASerem,chemicals,ammonias,bleach,sodium pentothal,detergent,purgative,liquor..

 

sedative.

 

Fry..

 

snuff the fire .. ashes wash away..

 

Biodegration.

 

I don't want to see her in hell..

 

Mutation.. abomination..

 

Blood..

 

.. my heart is melting..

 

..i need no more ..

 

..i became poison-primeval..

    

..decompose.

   

~~~ ~~~

.. ..Slip slimin' away ..the lovlies of Coco Rosie .. provides the Mutant Music & the backdrop for this piece ..::

 

-- Click here ,if you wish to listen to 'NOAH's Ark' by Coco Rosie !!--

 

A very special thanks to 'Jason O.' -Turtle Vidiot Extraordinaire for help on this project.

 

Please visit his ** TMNT Engine (click here)!!

 

..crayon,inks,colour pencil,MAGIC MARKER,design marker,Ph.shop,Macromedia Fireworks,water,blood,sweat,slime..

 

on 14" x 17" Bristol Board

 

- 17 ,October 2006

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Uploaded on October 18, 2006