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The Ugly Assed Big Eyed Tetrogenic Freak Challenge | by Studio d'Xavier
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The Ugly Assed Big Eyed Tetrogenic Freak Challenge

It's a love-hate relationship, this "Get Pushed" group. For me, it was first Bokeyland, then minimalism. Next, God help me, kittens and then the macro jungle. Like a true masochist, I put my name in the hat again, and I drew Chris of Arabia as a partner.


I received Chris' challenge while I was at work. It involved a YouTube video, which I couldn't view on the job. All day long I wondered just what the video was. When I finally got home, I eagerly surfed to YouTube to watch this video by Soundgarden. Then it hit me. My partner wanted me to make those big eyed freaks that I can't stand to look at!


I started to ring up a model to get the job done. I even had one model pose with an ice cream for a very nice image of demonic possession. But alas, I could not subject innocent models to this stuff, nor could I bring myself to ruin a good image of a girl turning psychotic due to sprinkles on her frozen dairy treat.


I was left with myself to make into an ugly assed big eyed tetrogenic freak. I listened to the song several times. It seemed to be a song about summoning a black hole to destroy the world as we know it. OK, I can deal with that. Black holes. Space. Chris wanted the image to be done in overblown colours with cartoon lighting. Then, to make it authentic, he wanted a 4:3 aspect ratio, with sufficient black on either side to make it up to a 16:9 widescreen shot.


What the Hell? I'm not some freakin' human calculator. I don't know how to do all this ratio crap! So, I Googled the words "ugly assed big eye photo manipulation gimp" and learned that the way to make myself excessively cute in GIMP was to go to Filters > Distort > IWrap. I tried the thing on a few images and almost lost my lunch. Even so, I steeled my heart, took my photo against a white background, and I opened it.


After I sucessfully made my eyes big and my cranium bulge, I saved picture and went on a search for candy colored galactical sweetner. I found it in PicNick. A couple of layers, a bit of massaging again in GIMP, a few color and contrast adjustments, and I was feeling the need for syrup of Ipecac.


So Chris, if I can get a model to give her consent for this treatment, I may try again. If not, please accept this almost there version of an ugly assed big eyed tetrogenic freak scanning the night sky for black holes. And thanks for a challenge that not only pushed my GI tract to the brink, but also one that kicked me around in my preferred photo manipulation program. After all, we do this for fun, and to learn. Your challenge did both for me.


And for Jordy's side challenge:


"The eyes are not here

There are no eyes here

In this valley of dying stars

In this hollow valley

This broken jaw of our lost kingdoms


In this last of meeting places

We grope together

And avoid speech

Gathered on this beach of the tumid river


Sightless, unless

The eyes reappear

As the perpetual star

Multifoliate rose

Of death's twilight kingdom

The hope only

Of empty men."


~ T.S. Eliot The Hollow Men


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Taken on August 17, 2011