it’s like you have crawled into my skin and I have grown used to the discomfort. you are beautiful to me, in your wasting way. I am certain this is unequal, but I am too sure that it’s just easier this way. you will stay in this stone heart of mine and maybe one day breathe warmth into it. I hope you won’t be too cold dear one. use my fear like a blanket. that’s why i’m doing this anyway, you know. so that I can somehow prove that fear should be a spur and not a chain. I want them to see that fear should push us further, not hold us back. and you, beloved, have pushed me closer to the crumbling edge than I ever imagined I would be. closer than I would have ever chosen. and I think I love you all the more for it. i am nearly falling, and you with me. we’ll land among the jagged rocks and wear beautiful glass smiles. so use my fear like a blanket darling. maybe you’ll come out unscathed.