May 6th, 2010 - 126/365
I remember when I first started this project, I thought, "What's if I went to hospital?" and by no fault of my own I somehow missed the 365. What's if I was under anaesthetic and there was no way that I could let the doctor know to "just wake me up an hour or so before midnight, let me get my camera and we can carry on with your little operation, oh are they my testicles?"
Well today was my day!
I got into work as usual, prolly around 6:30am and I ate the only thing in the car, which was a half empty box of McDonald's cookies. Which, when I began to digest I thought of Amanda saying "The problem with McDonalds cookies, is that you can't stop at one".
She was right, I had 3…. that's all that was left.
So I get unpacked, and it is unusually dark on this morn in Sydney.
Where I had to work was even darker, the thing was, the site light also blew… making where I had to work exceptionally dark.
I had the shits.
Next thing I know, I am working away with a brand new chisel, in the dark.
The site supervisor makes it his point to come and tell me to put my hard hat on, whilst I am bending over in the dark, using a sharp chisel.
I turn around and carefully tell him to place his well rounded protective helmet up his well rounded protective ass.
It goes on for 5 minutes.
I argue that the lighting should be his main concern and that being indoors in a corner with the hat next to me should wash over him like a careful thought of "I shouldn't give a fuck".
I continue to work, he then yells once more and as he yells, I over push the chisel and push it right across the palm of my hand.
After I give the supervisor what for… he takes me up to the shed and administers first aid, not before I spray blood all over his office.
Once they told me that I had to drive myself to the medical centre… which is also illegal. Especially with a fucked hand… how was I supposed to answer the phone? Drink a red bull and flip the bird to other drivers?
I go to the loosely directed location… and when I mean loosely directed, if he had of said "over by that tree stump you'll find a unicorn drinking a rainbow…. once he has had his fill he will morph into a a jolly leprechaun and after the little bugger has had a swig of his moonshine flagon… he will let you know what this afternoons best tips for race 8"…. they would of been a darn side better..
I give up, as by this point, my hand is starting to bleed through the rag I was holding, and head into the closest police station, I was a little woozy by this point in time. The officer on the desk saw me and said "fuck dude, are you ok? how did you get here?"… I told him I had driven and that there was a girl broken down outside.
I asked if there was a medical centre around, and he said I needed a hospital and that he would call me an ambulance.
I told him not to worry, but to tell me where the hospital was.
He said, I will organise a convoy.
I have never had a police convoy and I prolly never will… It really is awesome on one hand (sorry for the pun)… on the other it sucks… everyone sees the cop and then slows down to a snail rate for fear of being booked.
Needless to say, I thanked him in my wobbly state.
I got into the hospital, and after seeing a bunch of people, all who didn't know what to do with my hand… because she was a deep cut and I was loosing feeling in my palm.
I end up, 3 hours later seeing a hand specialist… and not the little thai ones that give out happy endings.
I get told that I need to go under the knife…
This day is turning into a party!!
Police convoy, now general anaesthetic!
They asked me when I had last eaten, I told them that all I had was 3 cookies all day.
They said… BRILLIANT… "We'll send you in now!"
Beep, beep, Gas…. zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
This shot was taken 10 minutes after I came out of gas. 14 stitches later. I don't really remember the shot being taken, but the nurses told me after that I kept saying the numbers "365" as I was coming too.