i've been going mad
i'm about to lose my mind, you've been gone for so long
i'm running out of time
i need a doctor, call me a doctor
i need a doctor, doctor, to bring me back to life
i've realized a lot of things since i've been home. i know who i am and what i want and what i believe in and what i don't. at least i did know. now i'm not so sure. i'm questioning everything again. who i am, who i was, why things happen and who they happen to, where i'll go and where i want to go. and i can't seem to put my finger on it anymore. nothing makes sense, because everything i believed is literally turning out to be a lie. all a lie. people i didn't think were like that turned out to be like that. hopes i had were crushed, things i wanted i don't even know if i want them anymore.
this is what happens when you lose control, when you let go of your insecurities and just face it. you mess up. and you mess up bad. i don't know what my stance on humanity is, what is right and what is wrong. what is true and what isn't. in general, i'm just confused.