Edwin Countertop McGraw And His Attendant View A Cathedral
Some days were worse than others. It was on rainy days Edwin felt the effects of gravity most of all, and his above average sized head would list to one side or the other causing him to take on a perplexed appearance to those unaware of his condition. It was for this reason he was forever seen in public with his attendant, Melchior, who, when things got really bad, would walk behind Edwin and hold his head upright until such time as he could get himself home and into a horizontal position.
(Thanks to my friend and cohort, Frogmuseum2, for the middle name!!)