Looking to the future!
Ok this is probably the most honest I am ever going to be on flickr but yes I cried myself to sleep on Wednesday night :-(
This could be a bit of a long story so please skip if you are bored!
I went to bed exhausted and feeling a little hormonal at the thought of going to college and leaving my kids with childminders!!! Turns out my childminder are Ritchies old playgroup leader on a Monday & Tuesday and Grandma & Grandas on a Wednesday!!! Yep you would think I should be happy but I have never left them since they were born!!!
Anyway, Wednesday night Ritchie gets up for a pee in my bedroom (toilet of course) and hides behind the door. I'm grumpy because I couldn't find any painkillers for my period pains and had to cope with a hot water bottle!!!!!! Anyway I just fell asleep and realised he was in the room so, I shouted and dragged him back to his own bed (bad mother that I am)!!!!
So I crawl back to bed and can't sleep because I feel awful that he was uspet. So I sneak down to his bedroom about 2 minutes later to apologise for shouting but explaining that mummy is tired and the conversation goes like this:
Mummy: Ritch, I'm sorry for shouting at you but I'm just a little bit tired. (Mummy cries even harder sighhhhhhhhhhh!)
Ritchie: That's ok mummy everybody always shouts at me. (Reach for the kleenex)!!!
Mummy- I'm really gonna miss you when I go to college babe. (Tears rolling down my cheeks).
Ritchie - I'm really gonna miss you when I go to nursery mummy.
Mummy - I love you babe, night night.
Ritchie - I love you too mummy (followed by a big wet slobbery kiss) one of his best!!!!!!
I crawled up to bed heavy hearted and cried myself to sleep, thinking about cancelling my college course because I was being selfish and arguing with myself that I should be at home with my babies!!
Now I'm posting this pic because they are the love of my life and as much as they drive me nuts jesus do I love them.