• I see you walking in my dreams, splinters of invincible movement from the corner of my eye, fiction and blood drowning together, the colours thicker than in photographs of your eyes.
  • Winter shifting out of December, reaching forward to pull Spring out of the calloused clouds, (the random smell of flowers dripping in the wind), wondering what waiting will bring. Dreams of airports and shredded letters, structures built of running faster, learning the contours of your hands.
  • I think of the chambers of the heart and name them in order, atria and ventricles, the left and right of each.
  • I think of tracing patterns, explaining the history of the word skin, from the German word scinten or schinden, to flay, as I peel back electric layers of myself and still discover you there.

365: 37 - 06.02.09

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Perhaps I should be ashamed, says the back of my brain, as I reach out for reciprocity. Perhaps I should fall down, check myself in to the lost and found, stay there peacefully until claimed. Kick my heels, properly tagged, next to a small box of forgotten apples, two overdue library books, a rain ruined Klimpt print, and wait.

This part of my brain is obviously insane.

Instead, when I am nervous, I want them to be nervous too. I wish us to match like a pair of jittery, colourful addictions, ready to dribble words the way a cork pops from bottle of something bubbly, ballistic and driven, dangerous in the wrong hands. I want us to assume and feel unsafe doing so, to tinker, to rewrite boundaries like history and we're the last ones standing. I want to be saturated in it, that understanding, that shared, halting drive, the cartilage landscape of unknown territory. Feel the certainty of it swelling in my chest, devouring my entrenched dragons of well trained doubt, dispelling the honeymoon aura of dread, and trust where I stand enough to take root in the sediment we've accrued, tall as a birch, as practically imperishable as the same.

It's primitive how I find the discovery of shared fear to be soothing. It triggers something deeper than sleep, more important than the shape of bones under skin, like being able to see the basic geometry of need, the invisible pillars upon which we build our waking dreams. I am reassured instantly as somewhere in my genes a fatal desire to know is fed. Such moments are a gift for which I do not know how to say thank you. They remind me of fire escapes in the same way they represent a way down from a burning building to solid ground. Effective, quaint, and incredible.

Theremina, RNFox, Slinka, and 14 other people added this photo to their favorites.

  1. azshrial 74 months ago | reply

    i am won over by your writing

  2. Eddi van W. 69 months ago | reply

    Hi, I'm an admin for a group called Creative Commons- Free Pictures, and we'd love to have this added to the group!

  3. RanFlash 56 months ago | reply

    Physical art!!! I love it - thanks for sharing!

    I wanted to let you know that I used this image (with attribution to your flickr user name) in an iPad app called The DumDumb Exam HD:

  4. Foxtongue 56 months ago | reply

    That's lovely of you, but if you'll take a closer look at my CC, you'll see it's not-commercial use. If there's money involved, you have to license my image.

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