flower for you
Nature walk (very very slowly) wit little man today. His face is dirty he was just doing jumps at the dirt hill with his friends. It took a lot of energy just to go around the block and hurt like hell but I loved being out with the kid and breathing air.. not staring at four walls. The kids friends had a golf cart they were toting me around on :)
I've had this shot in my head for a long time. Everytime we go on a walk he will find a flower to pick for me. He'll push my hair back a little bit behind my ear and set it in my hair. Smiling all the while, his tiny fingers tickling my face. His soft kisses on my cheek. Him and I really are kindred spirits, sure that is that seperation first I'm his mother then I'm his friend you have to have those boundaries. Our relationship is very different he's endured a lot in his seven years on this earth. I shield him as much as I can.
We are as tight as can be. He came to me today talking about a few of the neighborhood kids were saying less than pleasant things about me and it really hurt his feelings. I explained to him why the kids were saying what they were. Kids are mean at this age plain as that, but I told him what to say back to them that would make them shut right up. His lips curled up into a smile again and he said "Yeah, I'll tell them that, and they won't be able to say anything anymore". He smiled and one of the kids came around and he blurted out what I said. ... the kid look petrified that I knew what they had said about me..... and ran the other way.
Little man smiled so big I thought his face may break. It was good and I know it made him feel better. Ashame some kids have to be so naive to things and talk before they know what is going on. For the record I am not a zombie I'm just sick at the moment, kids don't understand cancer. :P It upsets him I'm so ill and he's trying to wrap his tiny brain about it. He understands a lot , and he understands as much as I want him to for now.
This photo is going to be printed and framed for our memory. The day he told the kids that were bullying him to stuff it and why... and he won. Go little man! :)