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Taking Flight {Explore}

#200

I wasn't even sure about uploading this one, & then it goes & gets explore. Go figure.

 

This is Hannah. Just stating that cos a few people seem to think this is me.

 

I might have chosen the wrong crop here, in which case I'll replace it later. I'm annoyed at the footprints, but when we were walking around we didn't really think about it. But Hannah's pose makes me think of Peter Pan.

 

I'm posting this photo in a kind of "hey, I'm still here" kind of way. I have been so awful lately, since about the 5th of Jan I think. I haven't been sleeping. My Mom wanted me to go to the doctors, because I'm constantly complaining about being tired, but it's not cos of anemia, it's just cos I'm not sleeping. Then she said I might just be depressed. I'm not, by the way. I just can't sleep. This sounds so stupid, but mentally I'm at my best late at night. I'd always put off doing my homework til late, because I could try for hours to write an essay during the day, find that it's awful, & then write it in 45mins sometime after midnight & find it's brilliant, & I go on to get a better mark for it than if I'd handed in the daytime piece. It's just how I work. I am so awake at night. I prefer to sleep during the morning & into the afternoon. So I've noticed lately that if I'm not asleep before 11pm, then I just can't sleep. I'm too awake.

 

It's been quite irritating having my parents wake me up when I fall asleep during the day. I want to retort that I've been up for 24 hours, & so at this point I don't care what time it is when I fall asleep, but I've been too incoherent to manage that. If I fall asleep in the afternoon then fine, I understand that, but in the evening I'd rather just sleep through. Last night I fell asleep at about 7.30pm, and apart from a few moments of waking when my parents spoke to me, I slept through til 7am. I'm still exhausted, but this awful headache I've had for like 10days has practically gone. I can't wait for sleep tonight though.

 

Oh, & big apologies to all the people who've messaged me over the last few days. I just haven't been able to reply, with everything else going on (that makes me sound busy, but mostly the 'things going on' have been in my head . . . ). I'll get back to you soon.

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Taken on January 6, 2010