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McCain: Bailout Expert

When Governor Palin entered the conference room, it was already full. She was confused. Steve Schmidt, John McCain's Campaign Manager, sat Sarah down. The room grew quiet. He just said it straight out, and told her McCain left. Palin looked confused. Steve told her that McCain didn't think it was going well for him, with the recent setbacks. His last act of unpredictable impulse, was to bolt. He was holed up in one of his Sedona ranches, his Secret Service detail dismissed and sent away. He wasn't coming back. Steve looked at Sarah, and asked her what they should do.


"Those things that we stand for that we can be put to good use for a force for good. Consummate maverick." Sarah said, looking confused. Steve agreed with her, that they would have to contact the RNC right away and contact republican congressional leaders as well as the Attorney General, and hash out what the proper steps were for a candidate replacement this late in the race. Tucker Eskew, McCain's campaign advisor, told Sarah he was on it, and moved to a corner of the room with his blackberry, hands a blur.


"Joe six pack, hockey moms, Todd, in great state of Alaska, you betcha." Palin blurted, confused. The other Tucker, McCain's spokesman, nodded. A comprehensive media plan would be critical in the next few hours, he agreed, and he was getting something together for her.


Appearing confused, Sarah continued. "Maverick maverick. Maverick maverick, maverick, and also." Steve looked at Lieberman, who nodded. He told her That was absolutely correct; those articles of the Constitution are crucial to their next decision, and he agreed with her interpretation of the 7th and 14th amendments. Joe told her if that's what she wanted to do, he thought they would be on firm legal ground. Steve nodded.


"In the great state that I am the executive of, tap into that surge that is working. Drill Baby Drill!" Sarah said loudly, with much confusion. Steve jumped up from the couch, clapped his hands, and told everyone to get going. He reminded everyone that they've got less than four hours to find a new VP candidate, clear it with the RNC, get congressional approval, and constitutional cover. "Todd Bristol Trig Track, kitchen table, Putin rears his head," Sarah added, confused. Thankful of the reminder, Steve added that they have to have the whole thing wrapped in a big bow for a cross-media branding launch, internet, cable and print. He then told everyone they had their orders, let's get it done.


The room quickly emptied. Palin sat alone, confused. She said quietly to herself, "I can see Russia," winked, remembered she couldn't see herself wink, and sighed.


Larger one here.


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Taken on October 3, 2008