every day is a struggle and i want to give in,
"i would say that it's the hardest thing that you'll ever do,
you have to change everything.
but with that,
new things are going to come into place that are better than anything
you thought you had.
we constantly think,
well we're holding onto these vices,
like this is it,
this is all we have.
but there's something so much better than that,
if you're willing to do the work to get it.
it is going to get harder before it gets easier,
and those moments.
when the cravings come,
and the urges come,
when you doubt yourself.
i still have those days,
i wake up and i'm like,
why am i doing this?
this is so hard, it'd be so much easier.
but if it was easy, and it was comfortable,
then everybody would do it.
but what matters isn't that you fell,
but that you got back up.
no matter how many times it takes,
it's that you get back up.
it takes fighting through those moments,
and the days you lose sight of why you're doing this."
- renee yohe, inspiration and foundation of to write love on her arms.
i knew this wasn't going to be easy,
and God it sure isn't.
every day i want to rush and go grab it,
just release everything i hate in me,
everything that's ready to burst open at any second.
this is day thirty four,
i can't stop,
and i don't want to.