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smiling but we're close to tears [50/52]

sooc except for slight crop. (oh and excuse my major sunburn)

 

right now i feel like i'm having a huge inner conflict - so here's the photo to show it. my head and heart are saying two different things, although i don't know which is saying which. i can't tell a soul, and those who know can see why. i'm stuck, im trapped. happy where i am..but possibly not as happy as i could be. its not fair on either parties - i can't tell the two people who should, and do, mean the most to me what is going on. because they're the two im breaking down over.

 

i got on the bus tonight after school and just broke down. i just cried.

 

please listen to this and this.

 

***

 

HOWEVER! i have been tagged by my beautiful flickr friend Bea..

 

Ten Facts About Me

#1 im having a huge inner conflict with myself right now.

#2 my camera Neville (lumix G3) is one of the most important things in my life, closely followed by my collection of film cameras.

#3 i don't waste my time being nice to people who i dont like: it drains you.

#4 i can be incredibly pessimistic.

#5 i live my life by quotes and lyrics.

#6 music is the soundtrack to my life - i love how it can make us remember something happy or sad, make us cry or laugh, and bring back the best of memories.

#7 i'm so glad i have flickr which i use as my diary to the world.

#8 i hate cheese except on pizza.

#9 i'm saving up for a new lens for Neville but i don't know which one to get.

#10 i wish i could break the mould teenagers are stuck in.

 

Bucket list: (some completed)

#finish a 365 project

#finish a 52 week project

#make a film, preferably one which is in black and white, silent, and made to look very old.

#make a career in photography

#complete my GCSE photography project without using a digital camera

#make my photography teacher proud (and like me again)

#live in spain for a year

#travel the world and meet my amazing flickr friends who make my life complete

 

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Taken on July 11, 2012