female ejactulation

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I’m going to write a list this morning. Mostly because I can’t think of shit to write. But I feel the need to write something or people think there is something mentally wrong with me and I’m depressed or something. This couldn’t be further from the truth today! So . . .

1. I set a goal to own a home by the end of the year 2013. To achieve this goal, I plan on building my credit and not fucking that whole thing up. This is more of an organization thing than a money thing for me.

2. The latest artist I’ve discovered whose album will not leave my CD player: Black City by Matthew Dear. A wonderful blend of funk, pop, electronic, sex appeal, and dark twisting moody badassery all over this 2010 release. LOVE IT! Here’s the song I Can’t Feel and here’s the song Little People. Personally I don’t understand how this guy isn’t a megastar, his shit is fucking incredible.

3. I go back to work today after being on vacation for over two weeks. Fuck me. FUCK ME!

4. I want to go to at least 3 concerts this summer. Even if they are small venues playing lesser known artists, that’s fine.

5. I take a longer shower than you do.

6. I ran around in the drizzley rain yesterday snapping pictures with Chloe. I love that type of weather because it’s wet enough for people to justify umbrellas which make for awesome pictures. But it’s not bad enough that it’ll get me and my kid all fucked up.

7. Next major road trip: Yosemite at the end of April! Looking forward to that bit a lot!

8. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more. I will not bring Chloe a few minutes late to school any more.

9. Do they actually sell condoms that are less than size XL? And if so, if you had a small cock, do you really sift through the merchandise and pick out the Mediums?

10. To the piece of shit who hit my car and left the scene of the MAJOR crime the other day, I want to rip your balls off and tear them to bits, throw them in a blender on LOW while they slowly shred up, and put them in the toilet and flush them down. If you’re a girl, replace balls with ovaries. Whoever you are, YOU SUCK!

Follow my antics on twitter @pimpexposure

alibubba, Fabiana Gauto Photography, and 97 other people added this photo to their favorites.

View 20 more comments

  1. Ting 婷 49 months ago | reply

    ur picture has always the impact.

  2. +gAbY+ 49 months ago | reply

    the clouds are almost like medusa's hair.
    building credit is good. buying a house a nightmare. I dont even know why we do it. Why do we do it? Own a piece of shit in the planet.

  3. Love from Larissa 49 months ago | reply

    I'd love to see a NSFW picture from you...

  4. Nikola IlIev 49 months ago | reply

    I wonder why only man...talk about no.9, LOL :)

  5. Loca Luna / Anna Gay 49 months ago | reply

    I always enjoy your lists, and your long exposures. Hmmmm... #5. I guess I don't know what constitutes a long shower. 30 minutes? 10 minutes? Food for thought on a Monday night.

  6. Loca Luna / Anna Gay 49 months ago | reply

    Ok, I just saw on the comments where you said hour plus. Damn, buddy. How do you not run out of hot water?

  7. nikkidelmont 49 months ago | reply

    great pic, perspective, dreamy sky and light perfect. now, if you can just get Chloe to school on time, get your credit straight and find the asshole who hit your car........i will buy you a bunch of XL condoms as a reward:)

  8. Lιzzιε 49 months ago | reply

    Whoa this is awesome

  9. Alper Design 49 months ago | reply

    ..is a good thing. isn't it? :D

  10. Lisa{santacrewsgirl} 49 months ago | reply

    I care about the image and this picture DOES NOT Suck.
    Glad you had a vacation I had one too....and remember

    You will not get Chloe to school late anymore...

  11. ~ Helen ~ 49 months ago | reply

    I don't know what to say, this is one of your best shots, the light, composition is all spot on. You really are a talented photographer.

  12. songbird who sings 49 months ago | reply

    Well this is beyond awesome and your facts made me laugh :D

  13. tru pettit 49 months ago | reply

    knew about the Yosemite from this post
    looked hi and low ~ but hometown says NJ..i could go on stalker mode and figure out where it says you live in SF somewhere in your stream...
    and..TWO visits on the same bush post??? i'm honored! really truly..like sally fields...oscar award gushing acceptance...=P
    have a great weekend...

  14. . ricarda . 49 months ago | reply

    Hello, summer. I can smell you.

    There seems to be some bad karma thing going on with your car.... didn't some asshole recently broke into it and stole Chloe's camera (but left yours, haha)?

  15. Shot.By.Shel Photography 49 months ago | reply

    I am enjoying the vastness and the title of this... ahah.
    Nice list - Go find the bitch who fucked up your car and video that shit.

  16. dixieroadrash 49 months ago | reply

    Amazing shot! Love the colors! Speaking of the Salton Sea, have you ever seen the movie? If not you should check it out sometime.

  17. Angela Mary Butler 49 months ago | reply

    I love this photo!!!

  18. Lila Limited 48 months ago | reply

    oh that is meeeean
    the title with #1 just sent all the females into a tizzy
    no matter what we say we're always thinking "OHMYGOSH HES FINALLY GOING TO GET MARRIED!!!!!"
    and then you really cemented it with #3 FUCK ME! (nicely played)
    #6 & 8 spends quality time with daughter (family man here ladies!!)
    #9 haven't you heard about India? dude that was one of the best articles EVER
    #10 did you really just threaten a pair of ovaries???? BAha!!! holy gouda cheese that is hilarious ;D

  19. Davey Ugly 47 months ago | reply

    the colors are great! i love the landscape part of it too

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