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Intimation | by thephohemian
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Intimation

Heavy notes in heavy

boats of sound

 

Movement, both too much

and too little

too rocky too brittle

singing just a little

 

All trains no stops

just voices no boasting

 

Strange requests

too forceful

too exciting

too much shaking

I am jittery

Nothing more to

Say but “Ok let’s

do it”

 

Shaking in the past

Now settling slowly

and suddenly dropping

and drifting and

drifting through

sand and air

stuck without a stick

 

Now more now

more sullen oh

depth of perplexity

oh vast specters of

width and shrill

with painful contortion

who sings but the

singer and who

writes but him who

sounds the notes that

all sing together

and all alone

 

Why the sound

why the movement

yet stillness and

quiet inside and out

all around

 

Continuously producing

not products but value

I am the valuation

I am the sign and I

speak both too much

and too little and

the lines are short

because the pages

are narrow and beauty

beauty is hollow and

I rest inside of it

sitting leaning cleaning

myself as I watch

how it all happens

 

It all happens so

slowly but quick

nevertheless and I

am lost in the

sound of time

with the timeless

pulse of language

stringing words together

intimately words with

words and you with

me and others and

I with others deeply

but hollow sharing

sounds and kindness

 

Now fast and vast

the nasty chime of

broken worn-out strings

and worn-out and

warm hearts

 

May I sit there

or should I stand

and will you kneel

for me that is

the question is vast

and perturbing and

what I want as

I sway and shake

and tremble

trembling will you

tremble with me

or will I tremble for

you and you will

tremble for me

by yourself but not

for yourself and

why was that the

wrong response yet

it continues so loudly

and proudly how

do I partake

how do I participate

 

And why so much

more and more and

the tracks are being

rolled out further as

if they didn’t want to end

at all but had to

eventually like a note

that sounds but knows

it will come to rest

with the rest in the

heart why lover and

child can’t you hear

how sad this all is

sad and beautiful do you

want it would you

say “Let’s do it!”

Sing with me before

I die and we die

and I must sing and

cry because singing

is not enough

 

And the words flow

as the music unfolds

folds contracts and

folds into the contours

of your face the

face of God the

savior where we

wait and rest and

will you kneel for

me and do I want

you to do I really

really want it even

if it perturbs me

and makes me feel

ashamed

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Taken on December 29, 2015