As most of you know i have been away for a bit.. And it feels like i have grown a lot in that time too, both personally and professionally. My programming skills especially seem to be leaping forward the most in the last few months. I find myself hungering for more challenges, never stratified with what i already know, always wanting more.
I am still fighting with something, if its still Lyme at this point or a byproduct of taking so many heavyweight meds for such a long time.. I dont know but either way, my kidneys are acting up, and that might explain the stomachaches and nausea that i have been experiencing for the last few years.
When i was 16 or so, I saw a specialist because my kidneys where leaking protein and small amounts of blood. They asked me to stop taking any and all meds and to come back in a month to test again. The protein count was down, and that was that. Now, after taking so many meds for so long due to the Lyme, I was curious to see if the protein count would be back up. So i asked my Dr to test my protein levels, and was unsurprised to find that it was back up... I go back for more testing soon, and then who knows....
I try not to let it get me down, but i know its hard on thous around me. They don't know what to do, feel helpless to help, and I understand. So i stopped talking about it. Stopped telling people when I was in pain. But due to the nature of the issue, it makes it hard to eat, making me seem like i have an eating disorder or something, because they forget that there is something wrong with me... since i have gotten good at covering it up.
But like i said, i try not to let it slow me down, let it control my life. :-) I'll get through it, i am strong, stronger than I look. Stronger than i should have to be.
My Quarter century is coming up... Going to have to do something big :-) maybe i will go sky diving... Who knows, but its going to be big :-)