princess violette of kittifurria 4:29pm, 16 August 2006
i was thinking that in addition to this pool being an archive for amusing things we see in Portland, it could also be a handy place to catalogue little things we Hear that strike us as funny in some way. Random snippets of conversations you hear walking down the street, on the bus, in your workplace, wherever, keeping the sources anonymous of course.

To kick things off, this is something I've overheard... it's hardly gut-busting, but for some reason it does continue to make me smile:

A man is walking down his front path toward a car, and a woman holding a toddler in her arms comes out onto the porch behind him.

Woman: Daddy's got to find a book about bats.
sfrances PRO 12 years ago
Guy that I see all the time in the building where I work, on cell phone,

"Yeah, I always loved playing with chainsaws when I was kid. I was really into them."
-Jarrett- Posted 12 years ago. Edited by -Jarrett- (admin) 12 years ago
This one isn't funny, so much as it's made of brain-glue; I haven't forgotten it. I was in an elevator at Western Culinary a couple years ago with some over-compensating white guys (over compensating because they wanted everyone to know that, regardless of their uniforms, they were indeed bad asses). The group of them were talking as we rode down, and they clearly knew each other. The elevator stopped on the second floor and one of them got out. When he did, one of the guys on the elevator - a guy who was clearly their leader and was trying mightily (and, if you ask me, was failing just as hard) to affect coolness - goes, "Alright - take her easy, money."

Take her easy, money.

Suck it, Shakespeare - there's a new genius in town.
Large muscular man in the 26th & Division Plaid Pantry: "Hey, this is the first time I've been inside a store in seven years."
CityVelo 11 years ago
While in a public bathroom in the Lloyd Center:

Little Boy (from another stall): "All done!"
Momma: "All done?"
Little Boy: "All done!"
Momma: "Are you going to wash your hands?"
Little Boy (after a pause): "Nope!"
secret rabbit [deleted] 11 years ago
Outside the Safeway on Powell:

Bum_ Hey Bro, give me some change.

Man Accosted_Homeless people don't ask for change.

Bum_ I'm not homeless, I just need a 40! Hey, you got some smokes?
bethanym. 11 years ago
I overheard a "money" hello at the B.O.G. last weekend. as in "yo money, what's up?" I laughed into my beer.
jrwilliams57 10 years ago
On my way out of the Hawthorne Fred Meyer today, while passing the WA MU ATM, I heard:

"I need FIFTY dollars to sew me up, or they won't take me!"
bethanym. 10 years ago
overheard a guy cyclist speaking to a girl cyclist as they wheeled by, "
I don't sleep with people who believe in abortion".
I wanted so badly to hear the rest of that conversation!
photojq 10 years ago
you all might be interested in this site:
jrpopartz 10 years ago
Overheard today as I was biking up Mt. Tabor...2 women were biking toward me, and one of them said:

"No matter how much eyeliner Tessie puts on, she still wants to be the TOP!"
Hart Noecker 9 years ago
Overheard at The Nest on Alberta:

"I was in Nam, yeah. But I was swimming around inside my dad's balls, so..."
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