(401 to 500 of 621 replies)
luckywhitegirl 5:05pm, 1 January 2007
2007

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// January \\.......................// February \\.....................// March \\...................
01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07
08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 31.......................................................................29 30 31......................

// April \\..............................// Mai \\...............................// June \\.....................
01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....0102 03 04 05 06 07 .....01 02 03 04 05 06 07
08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 .................................29 30 31..........................29 30 31......................

// July \\...............................// August \\........................// September \\...........
01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07
08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 31............................29 30 31...........................29 30............................

// October \\.......................// November \\...................// December \\............
01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07.....01 02 03 04 05 06 07
08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14.....08 09 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21.....15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28.....22 23 24 25 26 27 28
29 30 31.........................29 30................................29 30 31......................

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(401 to 500 of 621 replies)
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Monday April 23, 2007

Access to the internet is more sporadic now that I'm living out of a tent. (Don't worry it's not as bad as it sounds. I think I have a sublease coming up that will start in early May and until then I have a new tent and everything I need.) I'm getting lots of time for reading lately and applied for two more jobs in DC today. I'm considering taking a summer job at a locally owned sporting good store. (Well, you do what ya gotta do!). Here's today's picture from the inside of the tent:

All the comforts of home!
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Tuesday April 24, 2007

A very large skink-like thing which appeared at my campsite
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Wednesday April 25, 2007

Wow. Intense day. I saw my therapist today that's probably why. Really, really rough day. Lots to work through, lots to think about.

I wrote this poem. I need to memorize it.

----------
Stop.
Imagine what it would look like
to forgive them.
Imagine what it would look like
to be kind and patient and gentle
despite the rage inside now.

Stop.
Listen.
Remember to be kind.
Remember not to be afraid.
Remember to ask yourself what the most compassionate course of action is in any given situation.
And then take it.

Be open.
Practice empathy.
Listen with the ear of a bodhisattva.
Try to see out of their eyes for they too are the eyes of God.
And don't forget to love and love and love.

-----------

I really like that last line. Don't forget to love and love and love and love. It's hard. I'm out of practice. I need to get back into practice.

So I felt pretty shitty all day. I told a friend of mine that I know things cannot remain this bad forever. Eventually things have got to change. Things have got to get better. I say that not because I feel it but because ... it's just got to be that way. I don't know.

Anyway to prove me right this afternoon things started to get better. You know how there are these people one meets in life who are just natural healers? Well I have three people I know who are like that. And I got to run into one of them today. It's like running into a great big hug. I feel embraced and comforted. Things are going to get better. This time I DO feel it.

Maybe the reason I haven't found a job until now is that I was waiting for THIS JOB. This job is THE job I want. This job I have GOT to get. I KNOW I can get it. I'm going to work my butt off and pull out all the stops to GET THIS JOB. It's with this awesome, awesome group called the Center for Justice and International Law. It's a group formed by a bunch of human rights lawyers from Latin America. They fuckin' kick ass! And ...[drumroll please]... they want a bilingual human rights advocate.

Duh! That's me! That's so me! So I'm applying. But first I'm waiting to see if one of my international law professors will be one of my references for this particular job. My current references are all great but she's more relevant to this particular thing. Anyway I think she'll say yes. I hope she says yes. God, I really, really, really want this.

I am going to get. This. Job.
BellaGaia PRO 11 years ago
I love it when people take that kind of stand for their life! fingers crossed for you to get the job!


enjoyed your phone story -- I'm so behind....

and love and love and love...... that rocks

4/13 pix is cool --

BellaGaia (Living with BellaGaia)
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Thursday April 26, 2007

I have been eating at a lot of restaurants lately. Must have to do with not having my own kitchen at the moment. I'm moving into a new place next week though and after that I'm going to swear not to eat out the whole summer unless I'm on the road.

I didn't actually eat at this place; I just met some friends here:

Wise's Diner

And then right after I left I got rear-ended by a teenager! Caused a thousand dollars worth of damage to my car who is old and decrepit and can't take being hit from behind at 30 mph. It could've been worse though. I feel okay although I'm going to go in to the chiropractor and maybe get a massage this weekend. The girl's going to pay for the repairs to the car. At least my dog wasn't with me.
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Friday April 27, 2007

I feel better. Insurance --when it works-- is a wonderful thing! They're going to pay 80% of my medical costs at the chiropractor. I can even get a massage. I can actually get all the medical care I need for the first time in my adult life. Which is good because the first thing that happened at the chiropractor is that he did something to my neck and I nearly passed out. I don't know why; it didn't hurt, I just suddenly got really light headed and had to sit down. It seemed to concern him a lot which made me nervous. Why, what does that mean? I asked but he didn't really say and it passed. I think it was just one of those things. He was really nice. He wasn't the doctor I normally see. He was younger and okay pretty cute and --I swear I never do this!-- I looked at his hands and he didn't have a ring. But still. What would I want with a chiropractor? I don't know.

Florida native: Beach sunflower
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Saturday April 28, 2007

flipflops
CollardGreens PRO Posted 11 years ago. Edited by CollardGreens (member) 11 years ago
Whirlwind life...vaso-vagal response (faint feeling) and potential new job...you life moves in a whirlwind ! Perhaps warm trade winds are on the way. good luck there.
CollardGreens: Oops!
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Sunday April 29, 2007

Went to the Mennonite church today then had lunch with some of the members at one of their houses. After, we went to see a movie at the Hippodrome called Starter for 10. It's a British romantic-comedy about a working class kid who goes off to college and falls in love with two women, one a busty blonde on the quiz team and the other a fiery revolutionary who teaches him about the dangers of apartheid, nuclear power and eating meat. It was hilarious for the most part but the last ten minutes get a little formulaic. Not enough to turn me off though. If you see it around, I definitely recommend it. It's a good time. We ended by having some good scrabble playing at Maude's.

scrabble
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Monday April 30, 2007

I went to the chiropractor today. The insurance from the accident covers it. He said it's normal to feel this way after a treatment. I think it will be better tomorrow.

chiropracty

I'm enjoying a quiet morning and wanted to jot down some of the random thoughts that have run through my head so far.

I had a pretty decent weekend.

Went out with some friends Saturday night to a club to hear some live music --a VERY rare event for me. As a rule, I hate clubs, clubbing, club music etc. But this was different. This was a fundraiser for the local May Day events coming up and there were three funky local bands playing. One was led by a locally famous musical rabble-rouser who is a friend of my friends and normally plays solo. I've heard him lots at parties and he's really good. Another band was a local all-girl country/swing type band I'd been hearing a lot about and the third was a new group that had dreamy mellow tunes. All were very good. And the atmosphere was definitely not clubby. Only way I could've enjoyed it more is... well, if I coulda danced a bit (my back was hurting me). Or if I coulda danced a bit with someone I really liked dancing with without worrying about who else was there and might be watching and what they might be thinking.

Sometimes Gainesville is so small. It can be a bit stifling. Everyone knows everyone. They know your past, they know what you do, they know who you used to go with. Sometimes it makes it hard to just be you and not this person who does such-n-such and used to date so-and-so.

And sometimes the overrated coolness-factor can get very annoying. There are hipsters who are so haughty they spend all their time being cool and can't just be human. I can't stand that. One of them is this guy who works at the cafe I go to a lot; he showed up playing the drums in one of the bands there. He always has this real bored look on his face. I saw him at the cafe the next day and said hi but he didn't say much to me. I can't believe I used to have a crush on him. He knows too. It's kinda embarrassing.

And I saw my friend Jimmy there too, at the dance. He was the one I was supposed to go to Colombia with but I backed out on him. At first, he got mad at me but we made up right away. Still I worry about it a bit; I really let him down. But I know it was the right decision for me not to go on the trip. I just wish I knew if he still likes me as much as he used to.

All these little insecurities. Life is so petty sometimes.
AliThinks 11 years ago
Okay, first, thank goodness the accident wasn't worse! I saw your photo yesterday, but didn't know why you'd been to the chiropractor. Second, go you! Go get that job! I understand how you feel: I'm in the process of getting the perfect job for me. I want it.

Things will come together for you. Time takes time, as a friend of mine likes to say. Sometimes we need to be patient and just let things happen.

Alison
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Tuesday May 1, 2007

It's May Day! Here's the Maypole!

may pole
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Wednesday May 2, 2007

I woke up feeling ... if not quite down exactly, at least very desanimada, discouraged. I went to the May Day celebration last night at the downtown plaza and took lots of photos (none of which I'm totally thrilled with; I really have been uninspired lately. Need to get back into thinking about photography again).

The festival was good but also disappointing. I saw lots of people I know of course. Like Jimmy, the friend I was supposed to go to Colombia with whom I mentioned in the post above. He just doesn't greet me with the same enthusiasm he used to. It makes me sad.

On the other hand, I got to meet and hang out with Zot, the most beautiful, kind, loving, down-to-earth person I know. Zot is hard to describe. I hardly ever see her, don't even have his phone number and yet whenever we meet I feel this immense love, just pure agape love. Zot's a bodhisattva. (Pararenthetically, s/he's also a transgendered, or dual gendered person, which is why I use both pronouns.) An encounter with Zot is always a wonderful, healing, joyful experience.

Still. The event overall was a mixed bag. Some of the speakers were good, others just sounded angry. Even Lars, a favorite musician of mine whom I normally like, had a new song that sounded just plain whiny and juvenile. Add some bad poetry towards the end and I was ready to go home and do something else.

Maybe next year'll be better. But I hope I'll be someplace else.
(picture coming soon)
*sweet coffee* 11 years ago
I really like your picture of the maypole! A lovely tradition
*sweet coffee* Candy for the eye
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Thursday May 3, 2007

I SAW GRINDHOUSE LAST NIGHT!!!! My god, it was so awesome! (but I'm a big Tarantino fan so no real surprise I liked it). Excerpt from the review I wrote about it for my blog:

THIS is a great movie! This is the twisted underbelly of North American popular culture and in typical Tarentino style, its excess helps us see more clearly the offensiveness, ridiculousness and mere stupidity of it all.

I missed the Kill Bill movies but my friend Chris said the second one especially was highly worthy of the Tarantino name so I'm going to rent them both and see.

I move into my new sublease now! I get free cable TV, a DVD player to watch movies on, and free wireless! It's gonna be soooo nice! Like a summer vacation right here in G'ville.

So you might want to consider seeing Grindhouse. If you think you don't like violent movies (most common complaint about Tarantino) remember this: Tarantino's violence is never mindless or gratuitous. Unless he means it to be. Like in Grindhouse. But that's the beauty of it, you see?! It's an homage to the ultra-violent, hypersexualized, gorefest B-movies of the 70s. You gotta love it! (don't you? ;-)

Almost forgot here's today's photo:

Corn.

I ate corn on the cob for the first time in 8 months. NOT because I got my braces off (which happens relatively soon now) but just because I was craving it. So I tried it. And it worked. Didn't break a bracket. Fresh, sweet, raw corn-on-the-cob. Nothin' like it!
ItinerArts Posted 11 years ago. Edited by ItinerArts (member) 11 years ago
AliThinks 11 years ago
Glad to hear about the sublease and the braces! W00t! (I think I used to eat apples and stuff when I had braces. I KNOW I chewed gum.)

I can't wait until corn is in season here. It's one of my favorite things, and one of the things I missed most when I lived in France. I like how your photo is in black and white. (Heheh, I first typed "black and shite.")

:)

Alison
ReeBeckiSupergirl PRO 11 years ago
Congrats on the sublease! Here's to life becoming more normal again.
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
yeah raw tastes better and it's healthier.

wow I have done just about everything they say not to but even I would try gum. Sounds like it would just be a disaster! lol

thanks! I'm looking forward to it! I woke up worrying about/missing my cat who has been left out there at the farm. I think I can go get him today.
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Saturday May 5, 2007

So I'm all moved into my new place. It's nice. The best part is that I have my cat with me again. Here he is, Chairman Mao:

Life is good

But overall I'm not having a particularly interesting or pleasant day. I feel a little bored and isolated and lonely. There's no landline here so I only have my cellphone which costs 10-20 cents a minute (it's only supposed to be 10 cents a minute but about 30-40% of the time they charge extra and you have to call and complain). So that means I rarely make phone calls. I tried using Skype to make up the difference, but the internet connection here is so bad it doesn't really work. The computer itself barely works and I'm thinking of getting a new one but am unsure if I should spend the money I might need for moving.

Last night a friend came over to see my new place and we got take out. I was tired and my back was hurting a lot so I was in a pretty cranky mood. As he was leaving we walked out to the front porch and I saw a big fat cockroach so I asked him to step on it for me. He said no. Just like that. Just no. "C'mon please, I don't want him running in the house!" I said but still he refused and offered instead to catch it and take it outside for me. I was immensely annoyed at what I was thinking was his moral superiority at not wanting to kill the thing. "Gawd, you're such an asshole!" I yelled at him and then he got mad too and starting explaining that it was just that they gross him out he doesn't like to squish them. Okay fine! why not say that right from the start and avoid having people think you're a complete jerk???

Ya think he just likes to see if he can get a reaction out of people? I wonder...
noxious bulb [deleted] 11 years ago
You won't need skype to talk to people, but I am sure you already know that. AIM works just as well.... if they are also using AIM or something similar...
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
s,B yeah, it probably would, but I'm worried that the problem is the computer or the internet connection or both. oh well...
Loca.... 11 years ago
Hope you're feeling better, no more neck aches. Your dog and your cat look amazingly beautiful
:))

Loca
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Sunday May 6, 2007

I woke up thinking about trying to bring more simplicity and mindfulness into my life. I'm reading books by Thich Naht Hahn and Pema Chodron. I took this photo while waiting for my tea to cool:

green tea tag
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Monday May 7, 2007

Today I'm reading sci-fi!

glass
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Tuesday, May 8, 2007

There are wildfires 'round here. This is what the sky looks like.

Red sun sky: Florida wildfires
ReeBeckiSupergirl PRO 11 years ago
The sky is eerily beautiful! I hope the wildfires get taken care fo soon and don't affect you too much!
*sweet coffee* 11 years ago
Strange but beautiful colours. *sweet coffee* Candy for the eye
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Wednesday May 9, 2007

So. Kind of a weird day. Ran into a friend of mine outside a drugstore --we were both on our bikes-- and she said you know so and so and I said yeah and she said he's dead.

Whoa. I mean geez, even if it's someone you don't know all that well having someone tell you like that can really have an impact.

So on my way home I was thinking about bicyclists and cars and bike rights and I took a photo of this:

Bike rights

We need a bicyclists bill of rights. It should include that every basic driver's ed class teach this simple concept: roads are not exclusively for cars. Bicycles should be expected as much as you expect four way stop signs. We belong on the road, not the sidewalk and we have a right not to be run over by SUVs.
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Thursday May 10, 2007

I'm house-sitting for a friend of mine. He has fish.

Caz, your fish says hi!
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Saturday May 12, 2007

magnolia
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Sunday May 13, 2007

Wow, look at this:

anecdote for wildfires

Amazing isn't it? It's been months, literally, since it last rained. Incredible!

It might account somewhat for my good mood today but not that much. I was in a good mood and thinking about writing it about it long before it started raining. I'm not at all sure why I'm in a good mood. Let me think about it and get back to ya.
AliThinks 11 years ago
Wow. That's a really cool photo. Hope your mood stays!

Alison
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
thanks Ali... and a correction: it hasn't been months literally. just weeks. and I still don't know why I'm in a good mood.
ReeBeckiSupergirl PRO 11 years ago
Lovely photos! I love the flower the most.
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Hello there - have heard about the fires but no photos tell it like yours...glad to see the rain ! Hope all is well...
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Monday May 14, 2007

Well, I tried but today was an uninspired day for me photography-wise. Here's an old one from a few days ago:

half sadie dogsmile

I am feeling okay. Yesterday I had fun playing/chatting/flirting online with several friends but today I feel... I dunno. Slightly down for a very silly reason which doesn't matter but mostly just a bit bored. I'm finishing up a sci-fi book (and looking forward to being done with it).
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Tuesday May 15, 2007

Was walking my dog around the apartment complex today wondering what we could take a photo of when we nearly stepped on this little guy sitting in the middle of the sidewalk:

closeup

guess that answered that question, eh? ;-)

You know what? I'm having a really good night tonight. I'm happy. I'm drinking a really fine beer and listening to really good music, chatting with some friends online and playing around with my photos. The beer is called Old Speckled Hen and a friend of mine who knows about beer recommended it for me. I don't normally like beer but this one is ... nice, smooth, not too bitter. It's good. I like it. And the music is Radio Paradise. It's really, really good also, eclectic, and takes me all sorts of places emotionally, thoughtful, happy, mellow...etc. It's a good. I'm good.
AliThinks 11 years ago
I do love the perspective on this photo!
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
thanks, Ali! what a photo op, eh?
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Yow ! I really like the 15th !! Really good find...congrats - good stuff !

CollardGreens: Oops !
ReeBeckiSupergirl PRO 11 years ago
What a cute little bird! I'm glad you didn't step on him, that would have been gross! Old Speckled Hen is a fine beer, a fine, fine beer.
drab chicken [deleted] 11 years ago
omg i'm so uncool. i've never heard of that beer in my life haha
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Wednesday May 16, 2007

We had a memorial bike ride today for the cyclist here who was killed last week by an SUV. It was a nice ride. Slow and supposed to be silent and somber but I couldn't help laughing when I saw a sign my friend had made. It said "Please don't hit me with your car". I wanted to get a marker and add something to the beginning: "wet noodles are okay but... please don't hit me with your CAR!" lol... but I didn't.

I took a picture of this instead:

There's a life on this bike
ParaScubaSailor 11 years ago
Sad story about that cyclist.

Lovely photo of your cat on May 5th!

Great pictures, interesting details about where you live, what you do...
*sweet coffee* 11 years ago
Indeed a sad story about the cyclist but It´s a funny picture you took at the memorial bike ride.
*sweet coffee* Candy for the eye
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Most of the time, the message boards outside churches display cliches and I don't pay any attention to them. Every now and then though one will say something interesting, intentionally or not and it was one of those interesting messages that I was thinking about this morning. It said "God doesn't call the qualified; [s/he] qualifies the called".

So this morning during my morning prayer/meditation I thought again about luck (the "lucky" in my alias here is a reference to this idea) and how many blessings and privileges I've been given. So many that if I were really to try to count them I'd be buried under an avalanche of them all. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by it. I thought about that for a minute. How I never would have thought that life was about getting a bunch of things you don't deserve. It just works that way because that's how god/luck/life works.

So help me deserve it, I thought, help me become more deserving and that reminded me of the message board. If God doesn't call the qualified, s/he apparently neither gives us what we each deserve or people in Darfur wouldn't be suffering so much. But maybe if it's true that God qualifies the called, perhaps s/he also makes the lucky/the privileged/the very blessed more deserving.

I believe that also. God doesn't give us what we deserve; s/he helps us deserve what we get.
sunshinecity 11 years ago
Some very beautiful shots lately!

sunshinecity
~ a picture, a story
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Friday May 18, 2007

Today it happened again. Twice. Of all the cars that passed me on the road today all but two gave me some space. But that was two cars too many that didn't. Those two cars didn't move over an inch. Not a single inch. They didn't slow down; they didn't even see me. Their tires continued on a straight line as if I wasn't even there.

That's it. I'm tired of just hoping that motorists *might* decide that my life is worth more than three inches. Florida law says we get three feet and dammit, I'm taking those fucking three feet! From now on, I'm going to do something to ensure cars make way.

Introducing the make way security stick (until I think of a better name). It's not my idea. My ex-brother-in-law who was a cycling coach and made several cross country trips told me about this idea. "Take a piece of broken antennae that you can find on the side of the road and stick it out perpendicular from your bike. Hang a little flag on it and there ya go. They might not care about killing a cyclists but they DON'T want to scratch their paint job."

well, I never did find a broken antenna on the side of the road, but I did find a wire hanger today. If I find something more sturdy, I'll replace it but hopefully it's the threat of the damaged paint job not the actual damage inflicted that will keep me from becoming roadkill.

It's the law, three feet. Not three inches.

make way security stick -front view

p.s. note to motorists, if you don't give me three feet when you pass me I might not give you three feet when I catch up to you at the light. Hey, fair's fair, eh?
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
I do so agree with you about sharing the road. In the "low countries" belgium and holland if a motorist hits a cycle there is all hell to pay. Loss of license, fines and public scorn. In these areas the bike is a standard form of transportation...gas is more than 6$ per gallon after all. There are special bike paths, traffic lights and people really look out.

I think it will take gas prices getting to those levels to bring safety concerns to the forefront. Things have to balance somewhere.

Now - on another portion of the subject...the bikes have to obey lights, stop signs, cross walks etc to get respect.

Just my opinion...CollardGreens: Oops!
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
I agree, Collards, of course cyclists should follow the rules of the road too (most do) but I think it's an unfair comparison --comparing mountains to molehills even-- to imply that it's just as much the fault of cyclists. For example, if I run a stop sign on my bike, who's likely to get hurt me or the person in the SUV? I don't often run stop signs, by the way (being perfectly honest I roll through stop signs on neighborhood streets if I can see there are no cars), but that's not the point. The point is that because they can inflict so much more damage the overwhelming responsibility to share the road belongs on the shoulders of motorists. Cyclists can choose to engage in risky behaviour if they like but probably they are going to hurt no one but themselves. You can't say the same thing for a motorist.

Just my opinion...
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
May 19, 2007

Learning to maneuver the new mac is a slow, tedious process. I haven't yet figured out how to 1.) do the things I would normally do by right clicking the mouse (here I have only a single mouse button) and 2.) switch between two open windows of the same application (say two browser windows open) without having to minimize one to get to the other.

My friend Caz came over in the evening and we played Scattergories and Scrabble and shared some good internet music (he's a Pandora fan and I like Radio Paradise). It was a good time.

The nerdy faerie's ovary faced the dour duke's boner to split the egg on the divan
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
I am looking forward to the time when I can ask questions about a mac...looks like christmas is a long way off. Good luck with that.

To be clear - I agree with you on the "who gets hurt more" point of view. The person in the stronger vehicle has a responsibility to be careful...but truth be told you are equally dead if hit by a Punto ! (I don't like SUVs either). The road laws have to hold for all who use them - there must be an "expected" behavior.

It would seem to me logical that every new road be mandated to have a 1 meter edge for cycles...it would mean more tax for the road but in the long run it would be a better way.

When you cross the street in belgium, as you approach the zebra stripes cars are obliged to stop...and they do (expected behavior). Try that in a shopping mall park lot in fla...I am always afraid!

I do understand where you are coming from on the cars vs bikes...and agree we need to focus more attention.

CollardGreens: Oops !
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Monday May 21, 2007

Sadie got a new collar today. It's very soft. It's made of hemp. We got it at EarthPets.

Sadie, inspired by her new collar, sings The Internationale
Dragonhide 11 years ago
I'm a mountain biker (Although I must admit it's been a while since I last rode since my wreck)...

Mostly because the very idea of riding on the road sharing it with cars scares the living crap outta me. I won't do it.

That coathanger wire is GREAT IDEA tho!!!
BellaGaia PRO 11 years ago
I've never ridden in traffic and don't see too many bicyclists here in so. Cal on my commute -- usually recreational riders only. It must be really frustrating to have to be so concerned for your wellbeing all the time. The coathanger is ingenious -- if you can't get them to be concerned about you -- the next best thing is appeal to their own self-interest.
nice catching up with your photostream -- i've been away for awhile :-)
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Tuesday May 22, 2007

I went with my friend Caz to the Civic Media Center last night to hear a couple of former SNCC (Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee) activists speak. One was a local professor here in the religion department, Zohara Simmons, a black woman, and the other was this minister, Beverly Allan Ashbury, a white man. who recently retired to Jacksonsville So they had never met before last night but they both told their versions of what it was like working for racial justice during those times. He talked about being raised in a segregationist family and the first time he drank out of a non-segregated water fountain and how he used to work out of this store front office and it was bombed a few days after he left, a friend of his killed. Zohara told about how they all were called into an auditorium as they were preparing to go down south during the summer of '63 so that the organizers could tell them that three people had just been disappeared and were probably dead doing what they were about to do. (She was referring to the murder of three civil rights activists who were gunned down in their car after being arrested and released by local police).

Beverly Allen Ashbury and Zohara Simmons, former SNCC activists, recall life as racial justice workers in the 1960s US South

It was a nice evening. I wish I had gotten better photos though.
RobW_ PRO 11 years ago
It is a long time since I visited your diary; some very nice, interesting photos and deep thoughts. I'm with you on cyclists' rights. I hope your coat-hanger flag thingy works out - it just may do so, psychologically.
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Better photos...this one is spot on ! You caught them telling a story - crisp colors and animation...a good photo here ! I remember Jacksonville during the late 60s and the bombs / fires in the St Augustine churches...hard times then. I like talking to the locals who lived through those times...St Aug is full of people who remember.

Good stuff here - CollardGreens: Oops !
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Wednesday May 23, 2007

The photo below was taken with a Canon EF 70-300mm 4-5.6 telephoto lens.

camera dreams

I want it. I want it with image stabilization too. It's about $600.

So. Here's the deal. I want a new lens for my camera. I want a Canon EF 70-300mm 4-5.6 telefoto lens and a little hoodie. This costs about $300. I started out wanting an EF 100-300mm lens that costs about $280 that was recommended by an article I read online but this one seemed to be about the same for roughly the same price. With the image stabilization thing it's twice as much but I think I want the IS. That's what I took the photo above with and it was pretty shaky. So let me repeat this is about a $600 lens I want to buy.

Here are all the reasons I can think of on both sides. Please add your own in the comments

Yays (I SHOULD get a new lens because....)

1.) I didn't spent this much money on a digital SLR so that I could only use the lens that came with the thing.

2.) I think I'm becoming a pretty good photographer. Sure, I take good pictures with what I already have but just think what I could do wit a new lens!

3.) I've had this camera for two years now. I know lenses aren't cheap and the lens I want is nearly as much as the camera itself costs but c'mon it's been TWO YEARS ALREADY!

4.) It's not like I'm spending it on my crack habit!


Nays (I should NOT get a new lens because...)

1.) Unemployed shiftless bums should not spend that much money on anything other than rent.

2) It's not about the camera it's about the photographer. I have gotten amazing photos with my current lens and there's no reason to think getting a new lens will make me any better a photographer.

3.) I might have the additional expense of moving possibly overseas or to some quite faraway place and maybe I'd better save my money for that. (although presumably if I were moving it'd be because I found a job somewhere).

4.) I just bought a new computer; I don't need a lens as well and existentially speaking $600 worth of crack and $600 worth of photographic equipment is essentially the same thing, in a manner of speaking!
Dragonhide 11 years ago
Aw. aw. Awwwww I feel for you. I struggle with the same yes and no on a daily basis too.

Personally, I have a 75-300 without IS (reading off the lens itself) Canon Zoom Lens EF 75-300 mm1:4-5.6 III . It cost me a little over $100. I use a tripod for the IS part. I dont believe that IS will ever be good enough to overcome camera shake whiile handheld in anything but full sunlight that is, if you go the full 300mm which I do all the time with mine.

the 75-300.. I've used extensively in the past year.. check my photostream.. all but my self portraits almost was with that lens.

And- yes, you're GOOD with a camera.

I'll say about your Nay #1- A new lens makes a WORLD of a difference. My biggest is my new 50mm 1.8. Maybe because i have years of experience only with a 50 mm 1.4 film camera. It was like coming back home to me. In a nutshell, a new lens makes your camera a whole new camera all over again, it's fun.

Anyway. what lenses do you have now? just curious....

PS: Rent is good. ;-)
RobW_ PRO 11 years ago
Don't agonize - get the lens. All your pros are true.
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
wow jallen, how did you get a lens like that for so cheap?? do you find it awkward to lug around a tripod?

the only lens I have is the EFS 18-55mm that came with the camera. It's a pretty decent lens I guess, I just want to do more.

Rob-- thanks! :-)
Dragonhide 11 years ago
I'm sorry- I was wrong. "A little over $100" ended being a little less than $200 instead.

I got mine at the same time as my camera from here
www.jr.com/JRProductPage.process?Product=20372

And yeah, lugging around a tripod is nerdy. hahaha

I even take it backpacking with me. what can I say?

Failing a tripod, I put the camera down and use the timer to get a steady shot.

After 2 years I agree with Rob, it's high time you get a new lens. It does really make your camera feel like a new camera all over again, very exciting!
RobW_ PRO 11 years ago
And I agree you're good with your camera, the new lens will give you new wings to fly!
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Thursday May 24, 2007

Still thinking about lenses... okay, more research done now and i agree something faster is in order. Something along the lines of f/2.8 or so... but I want a longer focal length than I have on my current lens which means I want at least a 60mm lens. Maybe it doesn't have to be a zoom lens. Maybe it'd be okay to get a prime lens (one that's fixed at just that focal length as opposed to a zoom lens that has a range of focal lengths) . Anyone have any opinions on that?

Now I'm leaning towards these lenses :

There's an EF-S 60mm f/2.8 macro lens available for about $360.
The S there on the end means it's this new type of lens that Canon offers that is lighter and -amazingly- cheaper! But the drawback is there's only about 3-4 of these lenses available (I don't know why). The one I have currently is an EF-S lens.

And just because it was so cheap and you never know I bid on a EF 35-105mm f/3.5 for $135! That's a little bit faster than my original choice and I figured for that price it'd be worth playing around with on the off chance I win the bidding.

Anyway I saw these wildflowers growing out in a field on my way back from my massage this morning.

More Black-eyed Susans and woodland phlox
AliThinks 11 years ago
LOVE the photo of Sadie!

About the lens...hard to say...you only live once, right? And photography is a better habit than crack. ;-)

Alison
ebilflindas 11 years ago
Wow, it's been quite a while since I last visited--so much to catch up on. Sorry to hear bicycling is so challenging over there. Maybe it's 'cuz I'm a lifelong Californian, but I can imagine some of those truck-drivin' good ol' boys don't care much for bicyclists.

I adore your selfie in the tent from the 23rd.

And your poem...my fave bit:
their eyes ... too are the eyes of God.


Be Well!
_____
ebilflindas: Everyday Dad
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Nicely done in the last set of photos...comments on lenses...
Go to a pawn shop...thats right - you can pick up some real deals. I use a 50mm 1.4 and it works very well in low light, a 135mm 2.8 manual focus gives me some low light distance and then the "comes with the camera" lens for walking around. If you like macros a 60mm does the trick. Most of my lenses come from ebay and second hand shops - good values and you can try before you buy...bring your camera.

Good Luck...CollardGreens: Oops!
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
hey great ideas collards, that's useful information. thanks... I did find something on ebay I put in a bid for...60mm eh? there's an EF-S lens like that I was thinking of....

thanks! it depends on where you are for bicycling --some places are better than others but generally yeah it's challenging if you value your life! lol
eelend PRO 11 years ago
:)

¡hola!

qué pena que no haya venido antes por aquí, me gustan mucho tus fotos
¡tu gato es adorable!

nos vemos
cuidate mucho

izas
eelend's 2007
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Friday May 25, 2007

My friend Pat is borrowing my car for the weekend so I took it in to get an oil change. They said the front two tires need to be replaced... :-(

I passed the time taking photos.... Here's one:

tires

Also BIG NEWS:

I ordered a lens today. The Canon EF-S 60mm f/2.8 macro. I also got a vertical grip battery pack too.

I had to order it online because it was $140 more expensive at the local camera store! Which sucks because I am a big proponent of buying locally. I just couldn't afford it. Everything was way more expensive there. Anyway it should come sometime next week. I can't wait.
Dragonhide 11 years ago
W00t! I'm excited for you!! :)
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Good news - the 60mm on a digital frame should be something like 100mm on a film body (check the math). Use it on shots like you did above (nice one ) and you will have new control of your depth of field. Have fun.

CollardGreens: Oops!
RobW_ PRO 11 years ago
Well done on making your decision. And we look forward to seeing pics with the new lens.
dda1605 11 years ago
great lens, enjoy it.
I understand what you're saying on buying local , but most of the time the net is easier and cheaper........
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Saturday May 26, 2007

Zombies.

Saturday night. My friend Chris, the cool one to the left here with the Radical Rush t-shirt on and the intense look in his eye, bought "Dawn of the Dead" on DVD. I wanted to see it but it had also been a long time since I had seen the original classic "Night of the Living Dead". So I rented it and we had a double feature.

George Romero's "Night of the Living Dead", made in 1968, had subtle-ish political undertones that one could easily ignore/miss if you just wanted a simple zombie movie but are definitely there if you are aware of or looking for such things. The 1978 sequel is even more explicit. Both are really, really good, but very different.

Night has lots of references to international relations, the Cold War, fear of something "out there", containment policies, and sending young men out to die to protect those back home. Dawn seemed to me more about the absurdity of contemporary US pop culture and mindless consumption, although it contains some very relevant words of wisdom by a Haitian priest about the absurdity of mass violence who says "we must stop the killing... or lose the war."

I think someone watching Night of the Living Dead in 1968 would have more easily noticed the parallels between the regular nightly news reports about what was happening in southeast Asia and some of the situations in the movie, especially the scene where the young man is going to leave the house on a dangerous mission and is saying goodbye to his girlfriend who is not wanting him to go and the debates and power struggles between moderate Ben, the voice of reason, and the extremist Mr. Cooper the hawk who wants to hide in the cellar the whole time. Even more to the point, Romero inserts various news footage scenes with pundits debating the efficacy of various responses to the zombie uprising including one man who suggests that the answer lies in dropping nuclear bombs on major cities. For contemporary viewers maybe such things don't pop out quite as much unless you're looking at the film with an eye towards history and what was going on in the world during the time the film was made.

Dawn is a lot more tongue-in-cheek. The soundtrack is outlandishly 70s and the irony is laid on pretty thick at some points. It's definitely a sequel worthy of the original.

If you haven't seen these movies or if it's been a long time, they're worth another look. Romero expertly used the zombie device to show us what's really scary about the world we live in: the chaos and mayhem produced by irrational fear.
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Sunday May 27, 2007

bike trail

Went on a long bike ride with some friends from church today. From Oleno State Park to the South Entrance of Ichetucknee Springs. Just about 12 miles of paved bike trail.
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Monday May 28, 2007

white balance: daylight

Haven't left the house yet today. Trying to clear my head a bit and the idea of writing here is to do just that.

I am having a stressful/frustrating/disappointing day. It started when a friend of mine returned my car which he had borrowed for the weekend. First he is really hard on cars, because he doesn't pay attention to what's going on around him. He's the kind of person who will run something into the ground just because he doesn't notice that there's smoke billowing out the back.

Anyway this time he ran over something in the road and blew out a tire. Not one of the front ones that need replacing anyway but one of the back ones that was nearly brand new. He replaced it with the cheapest tire he could find. Then he returns the car with only slightly more gas than was in it when I gave it to him. Nice friends woulda filled it up, in my book. Third he said something like oh I wanted to wash it too but I didn't have time and then he left without even noticing that this annoyed me.

So this morning instead of doing the things I had planned to do today I went out and scrubbed all the love bugs off the grill because he was too lazy and inconsiderate to do it.

What bothers me is that he doesn't even notice that I'm pissed at him. He won't notice either until he needs to ask me for another favor and then realizes that I'm not speaking to him. He's so in his own little world that unless you stop him for a minute and tell him straight up, "hey, the way you're treating your friend here is a little rude", he'll never notice anything or give it a second thought. He's just like that.

This is nothing unusual for him. He uses his friends as if they were infinitely renewable resources: sources of money/cars and/or other material objects when he needs them. He's been a good friend of mine for about seven years now and he does this kind of thing all the time. I often wonder why I'm friends with him. Sometimes I get so mad I say I'm not going to be friends with him anymore but then eventually I'll forget and start hanging out with him because I like him for some strange reason. (I guess that's a good thing; proof I don't carry grudges, eh?) But still. I really think that I should not have a friend that treats me this way and I should stop being friends with him. But every time I've said that I've never stuck with it.

Which makes me think I must be getting something out of the relationship or I wouldn't put up with it. But you know why I think I put up with it? Because I don't have that many other friends right now? I need him or I wouldn't hardly talk to anyone in this town.

I need to move. I need to go somewhere else, make new friends and start a new life. I really, really want that.

edit: the photo above is just part of an experiment to learn about white balance.. not something I've messed with or think much about until now...
Jonathan W PRO 11 years ago
I have gone through a period like this myself, for a while after my divorce years back my group of friends shrunk greatly due to the fact I moved away, and had this very self absorbed friend who was no real friend but mainly just hung out with him because I needed a friend at that time regardless of how they were. The times changed and as I met more people in my new local I saw this person less and less and these days have to wonder why I did at all. Lol guess what I am saying is things will and do get better hang in there
noxious bulb [deleted] 11 years ago
Wow. Just read your last entry. I am sorry you had such a crappy day. I am at the very same point right now... and I will restart my life, too. Sometimes that's all it takes. Let's wish each other luck.
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
thanks faren, I know. Things have surely got to get better. I do feel that.

thanks s,B! I do wish you luck! Change is a good thing sometimes!

I should say though that on the other hand, there've been times when he's been a really good friend. Times when I really needed to talk to someone and he's been there for me. I want to honor that in the relationship but at the same time I want to tell him that I feel used by him.
dda1605 11 years ago
Maybe you should put "this friend" in the red list.

(Didier 2007 )
Dragonhide 11 years ago
Glad you got it out... And real friends will appreciate it when you tell them straight-up and not simmer on it... It's healthier all-around.

Good luck-- I have friends like that too... why do we like inconsiderate pricks anyway?

:)
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
oh sorry actually I wasn't clear about that part. I haven't actually talked to him about it yet. I was just thinking of reducing the time I spend hanging out with him. He'll probably not notice until he needs money again or a car....
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Tuesday May 29, 2007

yarn, light, couch

This is not an intentional still life. It's some yarn I threw on the couch earlier today. The afternoon light on it caught my eye. It's three balls of cheap Wal-Mart yarn (it was a gift) and a leftover bit of Nori Silk Garden... what a contrast, eh? I don't often knit in the summer but I have some legwarmers I've been meaning to finish up for a friend of mine so I picked up that project today (it was a slow job-hunting day). i think she'll be surprised to get some legwarmers in July. Unless she moves to Argentina. I'm a bit bored today. I wonder if there's a good movie on. (Did I tell you we have a tv here with cable? I keep thinking that means there might be a good movie on. Last night I started watching Bridge on the River Kwai but it was late and I fell asleep. Maybe tonight I'll find something else).
eelend PRO 11 years ago
:)

take care, sweet
things are going to get better

eelend's 2007
daxster78 11 years ago
Wow what an interesting tidbit on Night of the Living Dead. That's really not my kind of movie but I want to see it now!

I like the white-balance test pic, they look like blueberries. Sorry for the lack of quality friends at the moment. Moving isn't always the answer though. (done that myself)

Cool yarn on couch shot!
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Wednesday May 30, 2007

So someone told me that I'll never meet anyone new if I don't go out more. "A new friend is not just going to walk through your front door unannounced" they said. But that's exactly what just happened. Her name is, appropriately, Feliz (probably spelled Felice) and she's a friend of one of my roommates here. Her dog, Caleb, and mine are best buddies. She brought him over once before when my roommate had a dinner party. I swear I've never seen two dogs who are better suited to each other than they are. They just played for hours.

She stopped by on her way to the pool here and convinced me to go along with her. I had just finished writing an article I was working on so I said yes. We brought the dogs with us. This apartment complex is so dog-friendly that we could do that as long as they stay out of the pool. I have a hard time keeping Sadie out but Caleb wanted nothing to do with it anyway.

And we found out we have a lot in common. She's a grad student in English I think or maybe in an MFA Creative Writing program. Going to be teaching fiction writing later on this summer. Was an art major as an undergrad. We've read lots of the same books. I really liked her. I hope she comes back soon.

Here's a photo from the downtown farmer's market today:

drum circle
Dragonhide 11 years ago
Hah, how neat, how sometimes life throws you an interesting one here and there. :)

Friends are good. I'm afraid I live so far from civilization it's been hard to make new quality friends. So I cherish those I do have.
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
Hey Barb - making a quick hello stop (great pic of the yarn and afternoon light). Sorry it has been so long but the road, vagabondage etc....best - CollardGreens: Oops!
eelend PRO 11 years ago
RobW_ PRO Posted 11 years ago. Edited by RobW_ (member) 11 years ago
The downs and ups of friendship!
Rob
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Thursday May 31, 2007

I think I am completely unemployable in my field. I think now that I've graduated and have this dang degree in international relations, no one will hire me. Maybe I should switch tracks. Maybe I should try to become a freelance writer/photographer. Lots of people say I'd be good at this. Someone suggested trying to sell some of my photos through one of these things like istockphoto.com. So I looked into it and read an article on how to start a career as a freelance photographer. I wrote to the local paper and gave them a link to a new set I created to be my online portfolio. The guy wrote back and was nice but basically said that their freelance photographers come from their internship program but that if I see news happening and I take a photo that they end up using they'll pay me $35. Not utterly encouraging but not discouraging either. I think I am going to try the istock photo thing though. My new macro lens should come tomorrow. Tonight I am engaged in constructing a DIY light tent using these instructions via strobist. Here's my first shot:

1st light tent photo: flowers and marbles
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
p.s. It reminds me of a deodorant ad. I guess that'd be a good thing then! lol
CollardGreens PRO 11 years ago
I got real turned on by light tent photos early in the year by one of our own on this diary. Found good collapsable ones for about 35€ on the net - bought one. Great investment as they come with non reflective colored backdrops - helpful with diff colors on the subject.

Good job !
CollardGreens: Oops!
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Friday June 1, 2007

Got the new lens today:

orange crush

:-)

'nuff said!
ItinerArts 11 years ago
5-31-- Perfect for a "feminine hygiene product box"! Seriously, it's a good photo. I like what you're doing with the new lens-- great detail on the tires.

www.flickr.com/groups/2007/discuss/72157594528937014/
luckywhitegirl Posted 11 years ago. Edited by luckywhitegirl (member) 11 years ago
Saturday June 2, 2007

It is a quiet rainy Saturday morning here. All my roommates are gone; it's just me and the four-legged ones. I am thinking about jobs and the fact that I'm not finding any and how it would feel to resign myself to the idea of not ever working in the human rights field again, never using my degree and experience in that area, just giving it up and saying that part of my life is over now. Sometimes this feels like a good thing; sometimes it feels like a very sad thing. Yesterday I imagined starting a career in photography and writing. How much better such a lifestyle would fit with my dreams of settling down and having kids, with or without a significant other given that fate or my own pickiness has decided that that's simply not in the cards for the moment. And thankgoodness we no longer have to wait on such things in the 21st century. If I want to I can adopt as a single mother or at least do foster care on my own if I have to. Ideally it would be nice to have someone else to help, but that only means I will have to rely more on a strong circle of friends to fill those roles. Although right now even that is not so strong at the moment so these maternal dreams seem further away than they ever have been in my life.

And then I think about trying to let go of the idea that I can plan and direct my life like I want to plan and direct my career. Maybe such thinking is all foolishness. On the other hand I can certainly take steps to make things I want more probable, knowing its no guarantee of the future, can't I? So I've done that. I got this degree in IR, I took internships, I have great references... but even doing all that was not enough. who knows? Maybe my work history is too sporadic, too unconventional... no one calls and no one calls and no one calls. What more can I do? I can take a job as an office assistant while I develop alternatives. Maybe I was meant for those alternatives anyway. I was meant to be a freelance writer and photographer.

I will write my old friend Charles to see if he will give me some books to review for his journal. Work on creating a portfolio writing book reviews for an obscure librarian's journal.

And in the meantime I will try to make the best of what I've got.

Today's theme song

How's this photo as contrast to that post?

1932
luckywhitegirl 11 years ago
Sunday June 3, 2007

Went out this evening to take some photos with my friend Paul. This was my favorite of the evening.

Library West

I'm definitely going to start doing the stock photography thing. Why not? I take photos anyway... maybe some can earn me some money.
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