365/365: 525,600 minutes

Explore: #33!

Alternate title: if you can't jump on the bed in a hotel, where CAN you?

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Wow wow WOW what a year. I don't think all of my years have been so full of change, so the one I decide to document makes up for it, hey?



I decided to start 365 for a few reasons: one, to pick up my camera every day. I bought my Nikon D50 in the summer of 2005 and used it, oh maybe 10 times. For real. I have always loved photography and bought the camera to try to have better equipment, but I did not know how to use it and I got frustrated and my little P&S was easier to carry around.



I also did it to try to improve upon my creativity. Taking a photo of the same subject for 365 days straight can get pretty boring! Lastly, I did it for the simple reason of keeping a journal of my year, of sorts.



When my 'year' started, I was living in Florida, miserable, and traveling to NYC most every weekend. I had been seeing someone there but then we broke up but I fell in love with the city, met new friends, and decided to move there. Even with all the travel my life was definitely missing something, and I was feeling like I was getting old and would never have the things in life I wanted: namely, happiness and contentment.



I was getting excited with the prospect of moving. I didn't really have a "plan", but I have often been the type of person to act on instinct and sometimes not plan well enough; it usually works itself out. I don't want to miss a chance of something that could be IT.



Then a wrench got thrown in my plans. There was this guy I saw around on some of my contacts contacts, then he popped up during my friend Hilary's "International Tootsie Pop Week". There was just something about him...I mean yeah the obvious hotness, but all the other similarities: being vegetarian, having a big dog, loving the outdoors and the mountains, same political + religious + moral views, and so much more. But he was married, and lived in Denver.



Denver! Hmm...in 2006 I was debating a move to Denver. My friend Chris lived in Boulder for many years and LOVED it and wants to come back to CO so badly, but his wife does not. He knew I was miserable in FL, I wanted to go somewhere, and while I love and miss Portland (Oregon) dearly (where I lived between CA and FL), MY ex-husband is there so I wanted to find a new place to live. Denver was sounding promising...but then I met the guy in NYC, blah blah blah.



I started thinking about Denver again. NYC was still #1 choice but I also knew there was a HUGE chance I would be living off of Top Ramen daily, IF I was lucky. I decided I would still keep my options open. And I decided I would get to know this Flickr due because, well, it is nice to have friends in new cities, right? And he never seemed to talk about his wife and then I saw no wedding ring where I saw one before so I thought MAYBE I was mistaken about him being married. And if nothing else, his photography was some of the best I had seen. A little bizarre at times (and by a little I mean a LOT), but still captivating.



But then, as my brother would say, it was my LUCKY DAY! I discovered that this hott Denver guy was SINGLE! I mean, not that he would ever want ME...he didn't even know who I was! If you look at his Flickr stream he had about 23089472389074023947 (give or take 10) women DAILY commenting on how hot and wonderful and funny and amazing and and and and and that he was...I was SURE he had no shortages of dates. So...I decided to contact him. I mean it seemed weird, but rejection over the internet has got to be easier than face-to-face, right? So I decided to ask him about Colorado. And he responded back! And he told me some things, but then I saw that the conversation could die, QUICKLY, so I just kept making up reasons to talk to him...and he kept talking back!



Flickrmails turned into emails which turned into gchats which turned into phone calls which turned into him doing a hell of a lot of research to find out where I worked and sent me flowers to me which led to me (with a few other things in between) deciding to take a chance and MOVE there - before I even met him in person!!!



We finally DID meet in person, 15 days before I was to officially move (or, I moved 11 days after I left his house). I was SO SCARED I wanted to crawl in a hole. I was so scared he would not like me, or think I was boring or stupid or whatever...and the moment I saw him, I just KNEW. There were so many things that I worried about: his ex-wife, the fact that he had kids (I always wanted kids, but I had never dated anyone with kids, and I remember what a brat I was to the people my mom dated), the fact I was MOVING ACROSS COUNTRY with a BIG part of it being for the guy (I had actually decided I should PLAN of it and save some money and all that jazz and I ended up finding a job opening with my company like 3-4 WEEKS after entertaining the idea of moving at all), and you know, a million other things.



But the moment I saw him, I just KNEW that none of it mattered, and if there was any issues, they would work out. Nothing had ever felt more right than being there with him. The fact I had to go 11 days before seeing him again was TORTURE. I knew I was in love with him then and there (though I certainly did not mention that fact for a couple months as I did not want to scare him off, but hey, when you know, you know) and honestly, I don't know how some of these other Flickr couples do it – 11 days before he flew to Jacksonville to come get me and drive across country with me and it was the longest of my life.



But I am here now, and with him, and we are living together, and we have already had a lot happen...but when he is there it is all okay. He is completely absolutely THE ONE for me and I have never felt so strongly about this ever. Not even when I was married before!



A lot happened besides that. But I wanted to focus on that because it is such a HUGE part of my year, and where I am today, and where I WILL be in the future. I moved – twice! Once across country and once in-town from my apartment I rarely saw to his house. I got fired from my job of 10 years. My father died. Dave's beautiful, sweet, awesome 8 year old dog died. I started a new job. I went from having a single life to having a boyfriend, which also came with 2 kids, an ex-wife with a new husband, all her family, not to mention HIS family. I adore his family – which is important to me. And then of course, there is the everyday stuff. Some good; some bad. I met some Flickr friends who now, to me, are simply FRIENDS, not 'Flickr Friends', and I adore them so much – Brigid, Rachel, Jessi, James. We got 2 dogs together.



And of course, I learned about myself, improved upon my photography and editing, and became truly passionate about a hobby I always WANTED to indulge in but never felt I was good enough.



And of course, thank you to all of you who have been so supportive this last year. I mean it. Sometimes it is hard to keep going without support.



And NOW, I am going to STFU because we are in VEGAS and I need to GO HAVE SOME FUN with Dave!!! As of now I have NOT decided if I willdo a Year 2, or take a break, or continue on with YIP and include SP's. I do not know if I will start tomorrow or take a few days/weeks off. I guess we will see how I feel tomorrow!



oxoxoxo, ~Tara



50 Random Facts About Me
#50: When I first discovered Dave on Flickr, and started to learn more about him through his photos and the rare time he let in on his personal life, he was married, but I did not know he was in the process of a divorce. So, since I thought he was taken, I thought to myself, "This is the kind of man I want to marry. Since this seemingly awesome guy is taken I hope I find a guy exactly like him because he seems like everything I could ever want in a partner". This is 100% truthful, and maybe a little weird, but I just KNEW a person like him (if not him, himself) was the One for me. I could FEEL it and I knew if I had a guy like him, I would have my soulmate, if there is such a thing.

Now I KNOW there is such a thing. I have never felt anything like it. But when you know...you KNOW.

(and no we are not married, I have had many friends, family and coworkers ask me if this is why we were coming here for 6 days, and there are no plans to do it now or in the future, but I can tell you I am not going anywhere, so...)


And this part, I was not going to do, but for Dave, because he is such a stats geek ;-)

Total Days: 363.5
Days Missed: Depends on you you look at it! On Day 42 I was in NYC and completely forgot to take one, so I made this one up. I did have a pretty fun night! And apparently I missed Day 79 completely, but the thing is, I KNOW I took one that day. I know it! That was back when I was lazy and took a lot of webcam shots if I did not feel like messing with the camera so I am guessing I accidentally deleted it. Boo!

Photos where Dave guest-starred: 54
Day I got up the nerve to first talk to Dave: Day 58
Day I met Dave in person: Day 125
Day Dave came to get me and I moved to Colorado: Day 139
Day I "officially" moved in with Dave: Day 200
Photos where an animal guest-starred: 6
Photos in the basement: 65 (which is kind of a lot since my first ever basement photo was day 128)
Photos with Flickr friends (and this doesn't count Dave as he is MORE than a friend! ;-) : Four: 2 with Rachel-B and 2 with Jessi. Apparently the first time we met Jessi + James I did not use any as a 365 and the 2 times we saw Brigid (SaylaMarz) I did not, either. Boo!
Photos in my car: 31 (well, 30, and 1 was on the LIRR)
Photos in an airplane: 2
Photos of my shoes/feet/legs only: 38
Countries spanned: 1 - Just the US, I need to get out more!
States spanned: 8: FL, NY, CO, AL, TN, MO, CA, NV