I had this shoot with a pregnant girl that got cancelled and I was
very releaved in away cause I was nervous about it. But I decided that
instead of shooting her Ill shoot myself. Cause I keep waiting for a
photo to happen but it wont happen without me making it happen. So i
decided to go shoot on this road that I saw not too long ago that had
these old small electricity poles. But when I got there I discovered
some strange building that was closed up and locked and I was scared
someone would be there so I drove away to a field near by that I shot
in last winter. It was green again and beautiful but I just ended up
staring at it having no idea or inspiration as to what I was going to
shoot. When I did get my camera to try something out I discovered I
left the battery in the charger at home. going to get and come back
would mean I wont have enough light to shoot. So I shot something at
I really do want to take my photos up a notch and I do have a few ideas for new photos but I have no idea how to make them happen.
I hope I figure it out very soon. I don't want to not to shoot because I'm feeling too lousy about myself again like I let happen a few years back.
That pregnancy shoot is happening next Tuesday. I am nervous about it but not as much as I use to be not as much as I was 2 months ago. So I'm very happy about that, it means I'm making progress and thats always something to give myself credit for otherwise I fall into depression too quickly.
I think its been a month now since my breakup, Im doing ok all in all but its never easy. Its always weird to let someone IN and allow them to be apart of your life only to have it end and have to push them out cause staying in touch only makes things harder and more confusing. Its always a challenge and a difficult process. Life it weird... but thats nothing new.