Ci-Ci & PB

The last photo of Cici

It was the last photo of Cici, taken in 26 Dec, 2009.
One month later, Cici's life was ended. (May 2005 ~ Jan 2010)

I have to say, the last 2 month of Cici's life was painful, he couldn't poo by himself, so we had to do enema. I hope he would be ok, but I didn't realize that's the beginning of nightmare.

Cici had history in Feline gingivostomatitis for 2 years, and we controlled it well, but it's getting worse in his last month. Cici couldn't eat and drink because of the pain, it never happened before.

Everyday I hoped Cici can get better, he's in very bad condition, I could feel his pain.
My heart is broken when I looked in to his eyes.

The vet said the way to survive were to cut a part of his large intestine,
and pull out some of his teeth.

I don't understand why Cici must stand so much pain to survive, and I have to watch him suffered everyday.

I raised Cici by feeding bottles since he was 2 weeks old, I love him with all my heart.
Watching all the pains on Cici's body, I'd rather die.
SO I decided let Cici go.

The last moment I told Cici "You won't feel pain anymore, I love you since the first time I saw you, and I love you forever. There's no pain anymore..."
Cici died in my arms peacefully.

It took me awhile to accept Cici's death.
I wish every morning I open my eyes to see Cici's face, and he's next to me.
No one can bring him back, no one. I know.
The world an be so unfair and so cruel. I know.
And yes, I will be stronger.

Cici, I wish you many many tuna cans, chicken cans, and all you can eat.
I miss you everyday.