SNAKES ON A SHRUBBERY!

Titled thus because we're all anxious to avoid what has to be the worst m*th*rf*ck*ng movie of 2006.

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I was in the back yard with a laptop working, and this winsome 125cm (4feet) fella startled the bejebus out of me by climbing into a bush a few feet from my head.

He's not venomous, so a bite would not kill. However, one's reaction to discovering him is likely to cause one to hurt oneself, and can be a reliable source of comedy to observers.