My apartment building "Manager"

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Jackass of All Trades. Claims to have engineering degree but can't do simple math nor can he manage simple repair jobs. Is sloppy, slovenly and undependable. Rarely answers the phone during working hours, takes his time responding to emergency calls. Whines constantly about how "ripped off" he is "in this country". Is a pathological liar, flouts the tenancy laws at every opportunity, and does as little work as humanly possible. Favourite past-times: chain-smoking, visiting the local video store and hanging out at the university swimming pool while on duty. Has a passion for running the leaf blower (instead of the vacuum cleaner) in the lobby and creating bizarre holiday scenes. Example: one Halloween, constructed horrid dead body scene in apartment lobby using headless mannequin* complete with fake blood, a knife in the chest, and overturned lobby furniture. *used balloon for head as original head was missing. Apart from the appalling lack of professionalism, did not consider reactions of the little kids who live in the building. Second year, put wok on the coffee table with a severed bloody limb (fake, of course) under the lid. Tenants complained to management and this behaviour stopped.

Moved on to put fake "elevator will be broken for two weeks" notices on several floors well removed from ground level, scaring two elderly tenants who thought they would be forced to use the stairs which they were physically incapable of doing. Also posted fake "we're on vacation" notice, adding "please clean the common areas of the building while we're away."

Was caught sneaking into one tenant's apartment without authorization. Turned out he was using the apartment as a hangout while tenant was away. (Tenant is a university professor who travels to Germany every year for 6 months. Landlord would take advantage of his absence, sneak in, watch tv, drink beer, probably snoop around his apartment.) This totally illegal act went unpunished because the tenant was afraid to press charges. (Some people - especially wealthy PhD math profs who allow degenerates to intimidate them - might deserve what they get.)

Was spotted lounging on front lawn of building drinking beer while on duty.

Most recent transgression: obstructing mail delivery. For two solid weeks. Wadda guy.

Mad campaign is now afoot to expose this shithead, though we doubt he will ever be fired.

Is emphatically not a civil engineer as he claims.

Wife is five inches taller than he and wears the pants in the family but that's not saying much. They're both pretty much pantless.

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Taken on July 9, 2007

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My apartment building "Manager"

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