SPAM.

This is what happens when you put 10 people who don't know how to cook in one house.

I had just woken up and saw my friends taking this out of the cooking pan. They stacked it up to fit one paper plate because we were short of plates too. You can see the oil gushing out of the spam. Now just imagine how that tastes. This is exactly why you should have friends who actually KNOW how to cook (not just fry). :P