TessOlivia,'s photostream  

So I'll come back and type more here tomorrow, because I'm dead tired now.

And I might also replace this photo tomorrow with the colored version... Not sure yet.

Another thing I'm doing tomorrow is getting back to everyone who has Flickr mailed me. Sorry to those who are waiting replies. I'm not ignoring you!
I'm hoping to come back and upload more and be more involved again. Hopefully...

Goodnight!

Where do i start?

So if you follow my work (thank you for those who do) you might have noticed that I've been absent from Flickr for about 2 weeks. 2 weeks which I should have uploaded and finished my freakin project.
blah. I'm not gonna throw some bullshit at ya telling you Oh, I've been busy. or Computer shut down! So i haven't had anything to edit with! Those are all lies. I haven't been busy, and I haven't had any technical problems. I honestly can't tell you why I haven't been on. Heck, I haven't even been on to check my mail or stats or anything for that matter. And I haven't taken photos. Just haven't had the energy or motivation or.. anything.

So today I finally got up and took some photos. and i don't like any of them.
So sorry for this less than interesting photo, with my very boring outfit, and my very boring description which I really don't know why I'm still typing. heh.

I just have been blah. No energy. No nothing really. And this picture definitely reflects it. Didn't even bother to change into something pretty.
I'm not the "D" word. God knows if I say anything even close to "depressed" everyone will stamp me with a big red 'emo kid.'
And honestly, i'm not in a 'aw i wanna die' mood; not even sad or down. I'm just vacant. lol. sleepy.

Lets just call this. No energy. No motivation. Hibernation.

Sorry for disappointing you guys:/ I'm disappointing me too.

Yay! Explored;P #37.
thanks so much guys!!:D

I know I'm late and I'll do a catch up photo sometime this week:) Almost finished! wow, the year went by really quick. Its had its ups and it's downs. But overall good:)

Anyways, pay no attention to my knee in the photo xD ahahaha.

I wanted something more vintage and elegant looking but I definitely over edited.:/
I shouldn't have added so much extra white around the edges. ahhwell.

Anyways, those lashes are real! No mascara. But I will admit to a SLIGHT photoshop darkening;P to make them look a tad fuller. But the legnth is real. no harm done;) anyways, I'm heading out with a friend to grab a bite.

Tootles flickr!

"You wanna see me disappear? Well so do i..."

So... sometimes (like today and many other days) I just wanna walk away from photography. It gets frustrating at times. Suffering from extreme perfectionism the satisfaction I get after finishing a photo is not nearly worth the hours and hours on end I spend trying to perfect that photo. Its aggravating.

Another things that just kinda makes me wanna just walk away is getting all excited about posting a photo to Flickr and sitting waiting for comments and views. (which is so silly But I do it anyways.)

We all just want to be accepted by everyone else. We like praise. And since one of my dominant love languages is words of affirmation I crave those accepting words from people. It doesn't justify asking for people to praise me. That's just silly and even if I do when they do praise me I always think 'they're only saying that because I guilt tripped them to say those things'. I can never win xD

Anyway, what I was trying to say is it gets discouraging seeing all these people get 30x comments and some photos are kinda.. well mediocre. These people aren't even apart of groups! And I work my ass off and sit there all excited and get 4 comments after adding my photo to like 40 groups. I know this is quite childish but its just something that kinda discourages me.

And why am I telling you this? No fkkn idea. I'm not usually one to open up to people. xD

So.. not a fan of this edit. Too harsh. (there's my perfectionism) I miss being this skinny. I took this in August and waited for the right time to post, aka forgot about it. But since nothing I took today I liked I scanned through some old photos and this was PERFECT for my mood today.

blah.

Agh, as of lately I've had chronic headaches. Its only been about a week and a half but every morning I'll wake up with a moderate headache. It will linger sometimes fading but it usually comes back.

Its quite annoying.

But anyways, your not reading this to hear me complain. xD

So instead I'm going to fill this section with a positive quote bold smiley face:

"Laughter is the tranquilizer with no side effects."
Arnold Glasgow

:)

Happy Wednesday Guys!