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give up love, give up problems -- from dawn to dusk -- where there are flowers, scott richard | by torbakhopper
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give up love, give up problems -- from dawn to dusk -- where there are flowers, scott richard

these paintings weren't intended to go together.

they just ended up too close together.

next to one another in my studio room.

 

like so many of us,

these paintings look similar.

 

my mom visited this past week and she wanted the third painting from the left -- the other three didn't even exist yet.

but the painting she wanted actually belongs to someone else already.

but she was pretty insistent.

and she's an adorable little old lady, so i didn't want to let her down.

 

so i've been thinking about that and what it means and i just started painting about it, really. and the other three paintings are part of this discussion -- me coming to terms with the recreation of the painting to please my mom -- she wants an exact replica, but i have to kind of trick myself into getting to that point.

 

because, well, i'm a modern gnostic and i don't do the things i don't want to do. it's one of the the only two principle tenets of gnosticism. the other is not to lie. sounds easy, but trying living with just these two guide posts to mark every decision.

 

if you do, you will begin to see very quickly how much language and human behavior is literally just people flat-out lying to each other...

 

so i don't really want to make my mom a copy of the painting she wants. i also don't mind doing it for her. but, as my spirit requires, i want to want to do it for it be art that comes from the place of joy and freedom.

 

my art has always been about being part of a gigantic story of saved imagery. i love the history of art and painting and gods and fantasies and past civilizations both eastern and western and indian and ancient. we can never know enough about the amazing things we as a diverse and disparate creature have borne witness to over time.

 

it's astounding. we are ourselves everywhere and in all things we know!!!!

 

it is amazing.

and it's true.

weirdly so. and humans seem to have this same tendency about sticking our noses into everything and tasting it or smelling it.

 

as if in an inverse equation, within the painter's world there is a saying -- "you will get paint on everything you love."

 

damn!!! it's true!!!

paint gets onto the perfectly spotless carpet. paint gets onto brand new clothes and spatters onto unblemished shoes.

paint gets onto your favorite sweater.

it ends up being part of the accidental whirlwind front.

like a weather system that moves through a painter's world.

 

and i know i've gotten a lot better over time in learning how to minimize this inevitable tragedy.

but it still happens.

it sneaks up on our circumstances like certainty.

it's always just a matter of time.

 

like us.

one day gays are awesome,

the next day they're calling for our execution.

 

so you can't trust people.

i've said this before and i'll say this again.

YOU CAN'T TRUST PEOPLE.

 

so don't.

stop trusting your leaders.

stop trusting your leaders.

and don't fking trust me!!!

for fks' sake, don't trust me.

my words live and breathe upon you not trusting me and looking this shit up for yourselves :)

 

i'm just here to suggest there might be a truth within all of us that knows we can do better.

 

that we can stop getting paint on everything we love.

 

and just like in real life where every painter creates their own contract with paint -- each of us deciding how we feel about ourselves and the ones we love -- we make decisions. are we dumb enough to think that it's a crime to murder and then say it's okay to kill in war?

i think we are.

 

u.s. citizens live an unexamined lifestyle of pleasuring principles and monified values.

 

we all know it.

but these are our modern problems.

 

when will we get paint on them?

do they get painted?

do we take up our brushes and make an artful attempt at creating our problems?

 

for me, i live in my studio and my studio is me.

it's my body and my mind working together.

i work all day, everyday.

 

and the "actual" studio, is very often exactly where i am.

 

i'm either out seeing the world or in my studio looking at the world through my photos or writing about the amazing things i see every time i go out.

 

the world is amazing.

and i love my tiny studio which is my "room of one's own",

it is my creation center

for processing us.

 

and the people that i love,

they know that i love them.

 

and the people that i know

who don't 'know whether i love,

you feel this way because i don't love you.

 

i don't love very many people.

i know hundreds of people.

i can think of the ones i love with less fingers than a human hand.

 

a satisfied buddha said long ago,

but not really

because it was the snails on his head that actually did all the talking...

 

"i don't have 99 problems

because i don't even want one.

 

give up love,

give up problems,

son."

 

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Taken on August 18, 2016