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Last day.
It was a great day.
Sunny, warm…very different from that rainy first day in May, a whole 90 days ago.

I slept in, which felt wonderful. After I showered I took the train down to a café near BU, got some breakfast and coffee, and sat with my laptop finishing this project.

Couldn’t fall asleep tonight, saw the clock at 3:30am… and I’m not sure why exactly, but I couldn’t stop crying; perhaps because I’m leaving, maybe an overwhelming amount of emotion, excitement to come back home… its been a while since I’ve cried. Maybe it’s because it’s all over, and I’m scared. It was difficult, at first, to be alone here in the city, but there was a comfort in knowing that I didn’t have to be in Tempe/Phoenix where there are constant reminders of Chris and the times we’d had together. Boston was foreign, and I could make it my own.
Also, so I’ve learned, some people don’t know the whole story; why it was so great that I could escape Arizona, who I was referring to when I talked about “him” (if you still didn’t know by now, it’s Chris), the hurt it has caused, etc.… and I thought several times about retelling the whole story on here, but I never knew where to start. Some people have told me that I should write a book… maybe I should, but honestly, it now feels like this depressing sob-story and I don’t want to be just another girl writing about her lame, cheating boyfriend… blah bla bla.
Sad though, to discover that it is so pathetically stereotypical.
(But I still may consider a book…)
Anyhow…
I am scared; of going back to where I’ve been, afraid of having those memories rushing back to me, afraid of running into him…
I hope, more than anything, that Tempe is different tomorrow; that it is reinvented; that I can create a new “normal” and continue to be strong. I think I can… I’m just scared.

Wrapping up my Flickr blog makes it feel real. I don’t know what I’m going to do without my pictures. Tomorrow is going to feel tremendously bizarre when I don’t have to think about where I’ll take my photo, set up my camera (and take multiple shots before I find one I like), edit the picture, write about my day, and post it. My pictures were my constant. No matter what/how many new adventures were going on, I had my pictures to come home to, and having a constant was like an anchor, it gave me something to call “normal” in a very unfamiliar place. This project gave me an outlet (creatively and emotionally), and served as a reminder of what I’ve done here and how far I’ve come.

It’s been nice to hear people comment on my photos and compliment this project. Thank you everyone who took the time to look/read.

This has been the best summer of my life. I have, by far, had the biggest ups and downs I’ve ever experienced in such a short time-span, but altogether, it’s been an amazing journey.
In these 90 days I have:
met some truly amazing people
gained great amounts of knowledge (in numerous areas)
eaten a lot of ice cream/frozen yogurt
seen incredible sights
hit bottom
fallen out of love
found new hobbies
grown
experienced extreme highs
found strength
learned to love my own company
been inspired

I keep saying it, but I really can’t believe it’s over. Summer has come and gone, and it’s time to go home. But I feel like I’m simply returning to Arizona for an extended visit, not a permanent move… Boston has become another home for me… an escape…a place to grow-up… it was the change that I needed to gain a new perspective… it was where I could pause, take a breath from the breathing, start over, and learn to be me again.

What a wonderful second to last day here in Boston.
I got up fairly early and went downtown, shopped, took lots of pictures… just enjoyed the city.
Met up with Annette tonight and got sushi, YUM! Then we went back to Miranda’s and hung out, watched a movie…

One more day….

Life is crazy...
Although I’m still having difficulties with what happened with Chris and I, and it hurts, I feel so much better about it all now, and I feel ready to love again.

Last day of work… went to the Lyric bright and early, but of course not before grabbing a delightful cup of coffee. It was a good day; I read a play (Groundswell) and chose sides from it for callbacks, did some other small projects, and chatted with all my co-workers before heading out. They gave me a nice card and a Borders gift-card; they are so sweet.
When I got home I packed up my room and then talked to Steve a bit.
It was SO hot and humid today… ugh.
Annette came over and hung for a bit. We attempted to throw the garbage bags into the dumpster from the fire escape, but it was a tad too far for our liking, so we walked them all downstairs. Annette, being an amazing friend, helped me lug all my luggage (3 months worth of crap) down four flights of stairs, onto the T, and over to Miranda’s. By the time we got there my shoulder was absolutely killing me because I was carrying my hockey bag stuffed with over 50lbs of clothes.
Sweaty, tired, hungry and thirsty, the three of us went down to McDonalds to grab some grub. We hung at Miranda’s house for a while, and then I retired to the room I’m staying in for the weekend, talked to Steve, and fell asleep.
Only a couple more days…

This morning Annette and I tried to time it right and meet each other on the T- we have been bumping into one another almost every morning, but of course the last morning we actually try to meet up it failed, cause I was running late- haha.
Ate: poptarts and milk

At work I helped with contracts for the Kiss Me, Kate actors (rehearsals start this week), and picked out sides for callbacks.
Ate: coffee and muffin, late had fruit…

Went to lunch with Annette… had a small bowl of soup.

After Lyric I met up with Elise and her dad who came into Boston to pack her up and take her back to New Hampshire. We went to dinner at this DELICIOUS place called Finale’s- absolutely amazing strawberry shortcake!!!! (and pizza).
I wanted dinner to last longer than it did, not just for the food, but for the company. When it was over, Elise left. It hit me after I’d hugged her goodbye and started to walk to the train… I’m going to miss her terribly.
Went back to the lonely apartment, sat in Elise’s big, empty closet...
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Thought that this morning I’d feel better, but until lunch I was still very blurry and in pain from the migraine.
Ate yogurt and fruit, and had coffee for breakfast.

At work we had a meeting, and then we got to go out for lunch! Very exciting as it is restaurant week and we the whole office went out for a delicious 3-course lunch.

More coffee in the afternoon- Hi, my name’s Michela, and I’m an addict.

Afternoon contemplations:
What the hell am I going to do for my senior project?!?! I’m starting to worry. I really want it to be something superb. I think about Aaron’s Inferno and still get chills. I wish I knew more about one-man shows… I want to see his again, it was so inspiring. I have ideas, but I have absolutely no idea what to do with them. Can I write a one-woman show?! I want to create something original and personal, something that I can really be proud of… Hmm…. I’m at a loss.

I really didn’t want to take a picture today. Ugh… and I’m NOT very happy with it. I feel crappy about days with bad pictures… I’m a perfectionist.

Tonight: worked at Berryline for the last time. SAD face. It was so much fun though; I worked with some cool people, including my boss who bought me chocolates, and we had a blast. I ate a big final frozen yogurt- no holding back… haha.
After we closed they took me next door and we had pizza and beer. Fun times with cool people… gonna miss them.
I walked home on the phone with Steve- I was fairly smashed… and when I got home I pretty much crashed.