Leckie is unable to confess the death / inexistence of god.
After realising this we recounted a story from the past: Once, when we were approximately seventeen years old, I was having dinner with Leckie and his mum. We had both left home this same year. Having both been brought up christians she was asking whether we still had faith. "No, we've one way tickets to hell" Leckie told his mum, which upset here somewhat.
Kate and I tell him that his inability to confess that god is dead, whilst not believing in him, is the sign of a firm and deeply held belief. Leckie then seeks forgiveness.