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My suggested revamp of the US Immigration system:

DHS/USCIS Official: Do you want to stay in the US for good?
Immigrant: Yup!
DHS/USCIS Official: Are you a bad guy?
Immigrant: Nope!
DHS/USCIS Official: Do you promise to stay a good guy?
Immigrant: Yup!
DHS/USCIS: Done and done. Welcome to the US. Try to be nice.

Back home for more presents!

Back home for more presents!