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Jessica Kay wasn’t always part of the Living Dead – those who continue to walk the earth, long after they have passed. Although no records were kept of births, it is believed Jessica was born on the 11th January 1985 in Skopje, Macedonia. Although debate still rages over her real last name, Jessica continues to use “Kay” to simplify the situation for those with small brains… which she would later eat

When Jessica was a teenager, she continuously found herself in trouble as her hobbies included making small children and stupid people cry. She continuously terrorised her village until the day came that she was forced to stay at home and work on the farm with her mother in order to keep her out of trouble. However, Jessica grew bored of the work and carrying heavy loads was damaging to her back but her mother and father refused to give Jessica her own donkey. This was due to the fact that at the age of 15, Jessica was found eating raw meat behind a shed when she was supposed to be working. Her mother was afraid she would eat a donkey if given to her.

On her 17th birthday, after a successful stint in rehab, Jessica was given her first donkey which she named Elissa which in Macedonian meant “plump one”. Elissa proved to be a loyal donkey and Jessica didn’t kill and eat her. However, Jessica’s father had constantly talked of putting Elissa down. Elissa had a problem – she was constantly stopping dead in her tracks and falling over sideways. But Jessica wouldn’t allow her father to kill her donkey and so Elissa remained.

A few months later, after a hard days work, Jessica was resting underneath a tree when Elissa walked up to her. She stopped and fell sideways onto Jessica, crushing every bone in her body. Jessica was killed at the age of 17 by her own donkey, Elissa.

Jessica was buried in the family cemetery under her Macedonian name, Zoitsa.

It wasn't long until the dark lord of the village, Barry Gibb, came across this headstone. He felt sad for this young girl as she was only 17 when she had passed. He decided to return when the moon was full and give this Zoitsa her life back, but only she would not be alive. She would become part of the Living Dead.

When that night came, Barry Gibb performed the ritual of jive talkin, and resurrected Zoitsa. To this day, she is called Zoe Zombie and she continues to walk the earth, making small children and stupid people cry. Some say that she still looks 17.